


To be in the background

by Kanari



Category: Naruto
Genre: ANBU Yamanaka Ino, Anbu Hatake Kakashi, Angst and Feels, Everyone Needs A Hug, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Not Beta Read, Saving the World, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-12
Updated: 2020-09-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:26:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 19,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23116945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kanari/pseuds/Kanari
Summary: It was the perfect day to infiltrate the village from the inside. The important bit was not to know where to look but rather where wasn't being looked at, at all.The only way to successfully pull off a trip to the past is to send people who won't be noticed, that can blend into the background. Lucky they're ninja.
Relationships: Hyuuga Hinata & Inuzuka Kiba, Nara Shikamaru & Yamanaka Ino, Nara Shikamaru & Yamanaka Ino & Hyuuga Hinata & Inuzuka Kiba, Other Relationship Tags to Be Added
Comments: 33
Kudos: 97





	1. Infiltration from the Inside

**Author's Note:**

> Just had this idea for a time travel story because idk, I felt like there's been something missing from the Naruto time travel tag.
> 
> Warning: I know what happens but I haven't actually finished Naruto (there's soooo many episodes) so there might be some inconsistencies later on. Just let me know.

***Bang***

_"I have it! I have it!"_

_"Have what?"_

_"The time! It's so simple, how did I not see it before?"_

_"Woah, slow down. Let me see."_

***Rustling***

_"..."_

_"Is this correct?"_

_"Yes! Straight from the source."_

_"So the... Wait a minute."_

***Mumbling***

_"Where is- No that's not it... Maybe in here?"_

_"Ah, need any help there?"_

_"Nope! Got it - look at this."_

***Thump***

_"Gah! Don't just throw stuff at my face! I wasn't ready."_

_"Yeah, yeah, just look."_

***Gasp***

_"Oh wow."_

***Chuckle***

_"I know. It's perfect."_

* * *

It was a completely normal day in Konoha. The weather, coming into summer, was perfectly average. The everyday lives of Konoha's inhabitants had been much the same. So average that many shinobi had begun softly complaining. It seemed the usual summer slowness was in full affect. There hadn't been a security breach in over two weeks. Missions had been boringly normal. Even the academy students hadn't been absolutely horrible in a while.

It was the most perfectly boring, average, normal day to infiltrate the village.

A Hyuuga branch member entered the clan compound at mid morning, as the house was the most active. She walked right up to the Hyuuga guards at the entrance, who let her past without so much of a second glance. She was a little short, with dark purple hair and the distinctive wide pale eyes. She seemed to be slowly becoming swallowed by her oversized uniform shinobi shirt, sleaves so loose they dropped over her hands. Nothing else was out of the ordinary, she just looked like all the other Hyuuga ninja, Hitai-ate tied around her forehead like all the other branch members.

If anyone was looking closely, which on one was, they would notice that she constantly moved her hand up to her throat to find something that was not there. She did play it off as checking her flak jacket but the branch member seemed to expect a weight to be around her neck. The Hyuuga girl moved through the compound with ease, calling out greetings, smiling at other clan members and even helping an elder carry some boxes. No one noticed that she walked out of the clan grounds without doing anything of importance.

At the same time across town, a Nara boy wondered through the streets. The Nara gene could be easily recognised by his clan's signature hair and slouch. There was nothing of note about him; he wore the standard uniform, mesh sleeve poking out of his slightly too short shirt and pants with his leaf headband attached to his left arm. No one bothered him, as the Nara seemed to be going somewhere of importance without going that fast. To any who knew the Naras, he was practically running.

If anyone was looking closely, which no one was, they would notice that he didn't seem to be going anywhere at all as he wondered the streets. The Nara made it to the mission centre and stood outside as though waiting for someone before walking away. He did the same thing in front of the hospital, a random ramen shop and the park. No one noticed him get lost; turning to go down streets that weren't actually there, pausing if front of intersections for long stretches of time, staring at developing shops as though they knew something he didn't.

There was a Inuzuka training in most public and popular training ground. He'd been there all morning with his large ninja hound. Dressed in the normal shinobi attire, with scruffy brown hair, red fang clan markings and a large white dog, nobody would ever not recognise him as an Inuzuka. He was practising his clan moves with his partner, ignoring the ninja that went past. Though not uninteresting, normal shinobi couldn't learn these moves without a dog companion, so many people just left or lost interest as he continued.

If anyone was looking closely, which no one was, they would notice his grin widen as the morning went on. He became more confident under the sight of indifferent glances. The more that people just walked past, the more enthusiastic his ninjutsu. His moves became more extravagant as more people just sighed and left him to his training. No one noticed both the Inuzuka and his dog take the uninterested stares as a win, even after trying to be as flashy and as attention grabbing as possible.

It was early evening when a Yamanaka dropped down into the Anbu headquarters wearing full Anbu garb. Her long honey blonde hair was quite the distinguishing feature, even with her face hiding behind a raccoon porcelain mask. She had only recently been recruited into Anbu, but that in itself wasn't much to note. Most Yamanaka's did a stint in Anbu or T&I, or normally both, because of their clan jutsu. This was her first day an Anbu, as she had just returned to active duty after a particularly nasty mission had left her bed ridden for weeks. The was nothing unusual about an shinobi member returning to active duty after medical leave from a practically hard mission. Except if said shinobi was technically dead.

If anyone was looking closely, which no one was, they would notice the slight stain in her fingertips that came from hair dye. They would notice that she was a little shorter than she had been before her mission. That she was a little thinner, her hair a little shorter, her walk a little off. But no one did, because she was just an estranged, introverted lower member of the Yamanaka clan. She had no friends, hadn't talked to her family in years, and was now just a racoon mask in the dark.

It was the perfect day to infiltrate the village from the inside. The important bit was not to know where to look but rather where wasn't being looked at, at all. At least that's what Shikamaru said, but Kiba hadn't really understood. Hinata had though and nodded in agreement. Ino had been too busy learning her new life to care.

* * *

_"This has to be the wildest thing you've ever come up with."_

***Papers shuffling***

_"Woah, this is some in depth research. I didn't know you could show this much effort."_

_"Will it work?"_

***Sigh***

_"What even are these symbols?"_

_"I think... I think it's fuinjutsu?"_

***Clattering, dog whining***

_"Will it wor- Hey! Be careful with that!"_

_"Akamaru just wanted to see it too, Ino."_

***Bark, bark***

_"Can I have that page?"_

_"Sure, Hinata-chan."_

_"Shika-"_

_"Akamaru! Don't lean on that!"_

***Clang!***

_"-ru! Will. It. Work?"_

***Sigh***

_"Yes, it will."_

_"..."_

_"Then why do you sound so sad about it?"_


	2. A Raccoon, a Weasel, and some sub-par miso soup

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ino tries to adjust to her new life as Inori Yamanaka, Anbu agent Raccoon and horrible cook. Lucky she's trained for this... right?

_"Here, take a look at this."_

***Thump***

_"Ow. Can you stop throwing things at people?"_

_"...You're a ninja. Catch it."_

_"Argh, you're just too lazy to walk over here to hand it to me."_

_"Touché."_

***Click***

_"Ino-Chan, Shikamaru-kun, sorry for being late."_

_"Yo! What's this?"_

_"Give that back, Kiba!"_

_"Kiba-kun, th...that was rude."_

_"But it's Ino."_

***Bark***

***Gasp***

_"You wound me, Akamaru."_

***Sigh***

_"Kiba, this is important. And Ino's part of the mission. Give it back."_

_"Oh, why didn't you say so."_

_"Troublesome..."_

***Thump***

_"Oh, don't you start-"_

_"..."_

_"Ino-chan?"_

_"This is my cousin- my second cousin's- file."_

_"Yeah."_

_"But she died. What's this got to the with the mission?"_

_"That's our in."_

_"What do yo-"_

***Thud***

_"No. No way are you thinking what I think you're thinking."_

_"Ino."_

_"No. No, no, no. I can't do that! She was about to go into Anbu."_

_"Which makes it even better for us. This is the answer to most of our problems."_

_"This is ridiculous! Guys, back me up here, you know that this is ridiculous."_

_"... Actually, I agree with Shikamaru-kun. I th... I think this is the best solution."_

_"Yeah, this is crazy perfect for us. The timing, her age, the circumstances. You even look scarily similar."_

_"..."_

_"But she dies. And we'll know that."_

***Chough***

_"Yes."_

_"But in a way Ino-chan, she'll live."_

_"I..."_

***Sigh***

_"It's not Ino-chan anymore, Hinata."_

_"..."_

_"Call me Inori."_

* * *

Ino was going to vomit and she couldn't do anything about it. She never knew she would die like this - choking on regurgitated, sub-par miso soup and half cooked noodles because she wasn't to remove her mask. Or maybe she was just being overdramatic. Shikamaru said she could be but Ino didn't see it. Really, she had a right to vomit. This was the most important day of her life.

Because she couldn't afford to fuck it up.

The groundwork had been done, there were files in the Hokage Tower's archive to prove that the four of them were who they were pretending to be. That had been a hair-raising night of doing the most reckless and crazy thing any of them had ever done, even if it was planned. Half the worry was getting in and out of the building alive, the other was if their forged paperwork would hold up under scrutiny. Though, with both Tsunade-sama and Kakashi-sensei's help, it wasn't really forging paperwork. Right? 

They'd laid low for three weeks anyways to make sure but there hadn't been any indication their fakes had been spotted. So they were in; just in time for Ino to screw it up.

Really, who would ever think it wise to put Ino in Anbu? 

Raccoon followed the stoic Crane down one of the many bland, confusing tunnels under the Anbu headquarters and vowed to never cook again. It had to be the food, which she'd cooked last night in a fit of nerves, and not the shaking in her hands that Ino couldn't control. She knew where they were going and even with the months of rigorous training as preparation, she was not ready. But instead of freaking out, vomiting and running away like she wanted to, Raccoon just followed Crane silently. 

Soon enough - though both far too long and way to quickly for Ino - the two of them reached a door. Crane didn't even pause before opening it, leading Ino into a large room. It appeared to be an indoor training ground, greatly resembling the room the preliminaries of Ino's Chunin exam were held in. Jumping down from a second level balcony, two more masked figures approached. What caught Ino's eye was the Anbu wearing an owl mask seemed to be carrying a clipboard and taking notes.

"Although you have already been chosen for the Anbu, we wish to see your potential. You will be sparing with Weasel." Crane elaborated, waiting for her reply as the second figure stepped forward.

And standing in front of her was a boy. A child really. A future mass murderer. 

Ino felt like she'd been concussed. She'd been preparing herself to run into a younger Kakashi-sensei or Yamato-sensei or even many of the other shinobi she knew had once been a part of Anbu. Ino was not prepared to be face to face with a young Itachi Uchiha. He was so little she had to look down slightly. Even with the weasel mask on, she knew it was Itachi. She liked to think it was her investigative skills that led to the identification, but in reality, she had heard many stories about the young Uchiha with the weasel mask.

One good thing about Anbu was that silence was a given. She wouldn't have been able to reply even if she wanted to. Instead, Ino just nodded and moved to the centre of the room.

She could do this. She'd trained for months for this. He was the perfect opponent really. She had to do this. She had to.

Itachi Uchiha stood in front of her and they formed the seal of confrontation. The room seemed to breathe in.

And then Weasel _moved_. 

She couldn't do this.

Ino barely ducked the shuriken that flew right where her head was before turning to the left. A glint of metal tugged at her armoured side. The little bastard had thrown more to counter her dodge. 

She had to get away. But suddenly all she saw was steel. A kunai flashed towards her and on instinct, Ino threw up her elbow, letting the blade glance off the mesh armour over the joint as she reached for her own. 

Like knowing that the sun would set each day and that thunder came after lightning, Ino knew she couldn't beat Itachi. Not now, maybe not ever. She had to get away. Draw it out. Create a weakness. Because she had trained to specifically fight the Sharingan; they all had. She had to delay, distract, create distance. _Get away_. 

So Ino backed up as their kunai danced. A spark, sharp edges glanced away, a scratch appeared on Ino's forearm. Sharingan turned behind a mask but Ino wasn't making eye contact. Weasel didn't seem fazed, cutting at her with killer proficiency. He dislodged her kunai on his third strike, sending it spinning upwards. Ino let it go, stepping back, letting three shuriken fly as she went. Itachi batted them away and threw two of his own. Her shoulder stung as skin broke but only one had hit her. 

A clang above her was her only warning as Weasel kicked out. Bringing her new kunai up, she blocked with her arms crossed. Ino also turned slightly, compromising the strength of her block, but it turned out to be the right call. Her leg bled through the rip her lost kunai had made. Itachi had used a shuriken to weaponize the spinning blade against her. Tricky little shit.

His ploy worked and his kick overpowered her, sending Ino back. She rolled to left, throwing kunai with explosive tags attached to buy her time. They exploded, smoke billowing out. Ino stood up and Itachi flew out of the cloud, baring down on her. Swinging to the side, she retreated. The wall behind her seemed to be closing in. Ino's hair swung wildly as she went on the defence, redirecting what she could, minimising what she couldn't. 

Her arms stung from numerous paper-thin cuts. Her legs shook slightly. Her breathing became harsher, confined by the mask. Her back warm from sweat.

She backed up again. They were getting closer to the side of the room. Crane and Owl watched impassively but Ino could feel their disinterest. Which made anger burn in her throat. How dare they? She was fighting Itachi fucking Uchiha. Ino couldn't beat Itachi. 

But Raccoon might.

The shadow of the upper floor reached out to her and Raccoon took her chance. Weasel drove his kunai forward and, to his surprise, his opponent let him. The blade slid straight through the side of her armour and the Yamanaka fell away from him. Weasel paused in shock. That was all Raccoon needed.

Raccoon fell back, _into_ the shadows and disappeared. 

The room stilled.

But Raccoon didn't have time to be smug. The Sharingan would catch up soon. She crushed her chakra down and shifted.

Three senbon appeared from the shadows to the right of Weasel. He tensed to jump but found he couldn't. Instead he watched as Raccoon appeared out of the shadows, hands formed in a simple clan handseal. Her body started to drop but time seemed to slow. Itachi's Sharingan focused on the senbon and their trajectory sharpened. That's when he noticed that all three had been thrown just after one another. And the first one's aim was off. 

Raccoon let the senbon fly towards the body she was now possessing. She waited, watching with enhanced focus only the Sharingan could supply. Just as the first pierced Weasel's skin, she let the jutsu go, coming back to her body before it had even hit the ground. Twisting into a roll, she threw two handfuls of shuriken as she fell, not really caring where half of them went. 

Weasel moved to strike some of the shuriken away and found he couldn't. His right arm was unresponsive, the senbon embedded in his shoulder like a taunt. And then the hail of shuriken was upon him. 

Rolling into a crouch, Raccoon prepared more shuriken. But just as she pulled them out, cold pressed against her throat. Looking up, she found a panting, bleeding Weasel holding a kunai to her neck. She did a quick check of the Uchiha, noticing a shuriken in his right shoulder and two in his side. The kunai that held her was being gripped in his left hand while his right arm hung uselessly. 

Raccoon didn't try to hide her viscous grin at the sight, none of them could see it anyways. It had worked. The strategy was one of the weaker ones they had come up with to use the Sharingan against the user and _it had worked_. The fight may not have ended in her favour but she would take it as a win.

"Where did you learn that shadow technique?" Itachi asked.

The question was so unexpected that the answer was automatic, if a bit breathless. "A Nara."

With a flicker, the two watching Anbu now stood above them. Signalling with hand signs Raccoon secretly already knew, Weasel stepped back. The fight had ended. Raccoon's adrenaline drained away, taking her energy with it. Her hand shook as the two made the seal of reconciliation, which made Ino drop it quickly.

"Do you require medical attention?" Crane asked but didn't wait for an answer before placing a cool, healing hand on Ino's side. 

Almost as quickly as the injury had been made the wound had disappeared, leaving nothing but a slight tightness to the new skin. The Anbu didn't try to heal any of Raccoon's multiple scrapes and light cuts and Ino didn't ask them to.

"The senbon have immobilised your arm muscles," Ino offered as she stood up, shaking her tingling right arm. "Movement will return soon after they are removed." 

All she got was a polite nod from Itachi before he and Crane disappeared in a swirl of leaves. Only then did the room finally breathe out with Ino. 

"Raccoon, please report here at the specified time." Owl stated without a single inflection, holding out a scroll. The void of space around them swallowed his words, leaving the Yamanaka empty of approval. 

Nodding, Ino mechanically took the scroll and exited the building. The stars were bright above her as the Yamanaka walked away from her new reality. She kept up a casual pace as she left from a secret entrance. Nothing moved except Raccoon as she turned a corner, cutting her from view of Anbu headquarters.

With no change in outward demeanour, Ino then promptly turned and pulled her mask to the side before vomiting in a nearby bush.

* * *

_"Ino."_

_"Shika."_

***Sigh***

_"Just say it, Shika."_

_"I - no. Are you prepared for this?"_

_"I'm ready."_

_"Ino-"_

_"Are you prepared for the mission?"_

_"..."_

_"It's going to be hard for everyone."_

_"Yes, but it's going to be harder for you."_

_"I - I know. But I have to be."_

***Sigh***

_"My father told me about her, you know? He said I looked like her, reminded him of her."_

_"I know."_

***Chuckle***

_"Of course you do. But... What if?"_

_"Ino, trust me just a little. Everything's been planned out; every possible decision, mistake, event - if that happens - well, it won't ok?"_

_"Oh, so that's why you look like you haven't slept in weeks."_

_"You don't look much better."_

_"Wow, thanks. You sure know how to compliment a girl... Kakashi-sensei and Yamato-sensei have been training me non-stop since you thought up this crazy plan."_

_"..."_

_"I'm ready, Shika. I-I have to be. For Neji and Asuma-sensei and my father and your father a-and -"_

_"For Choji."_

_"-Choji."_

_"..."_

_"Ino, I don't know what I'll do if I see him there."_

_"Which one?"_

_"Any of them."_

***Sigh***

_"Me neither."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finished this less than an hour ago. Please enjoy and ignore any obvious mistakes because I haven't proof-read it yet.


	3. It's Only Different when the Sun Sets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time travel is such a drag. Shikamaru's having a hard time adjusting. At least he as his friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This may read differently than the first two- i had to force it out. Writers block sucks. Please enjoy.  
> I had no idea what I was going to do with this chapter. I had the start and that was it until yesterday. I've decided that I'm fine with having no idea about anything- it's my natural state of being. Imma embrace it.

_"Hey, Asuma-sensei. It's been a while."_

_"..."_

_"Sorry about that, I've been busy. I'm... Well, Ino and I, are going to a mission soon. It's going to be hard and long and honestly, this is the craziest thing I have ever done. No, seriously, this is wild."_

***Groan***

_"And it's so troublesome. I feel like I haven't slept in weeks. Which... I haven't? Wait a minute, the days have blurred together."_

***Muttering***

_"I don't think I've slept more that 10 hours in the last week. If today is Monday. If not- eh, I don't know. Wow, you should be proud, sensei, I'm actually working."_

***Chuckle***

_"I can't really tell you about it. Top secret and all that. There could be ears anywhere. Even here... I'm sorry, I won't be able to train Mirai like you wanted. But, maybe, if we pull this mission off..."_

***Sigh***

_"Asuma-sensei, can you... Can you let Choji know about all this? I've gone to see Dad but Choji isn't- doesn't have a-a-"_

***Hiccup***

_"Fuck. If I can't even keep- how am I going to- there's so much that could- damn... Sorry, sleep deprivation. I'm acting like a little genin. There's just so many parts to this, you wouldn't believe. I-"_

_"..."_

_"-I'm going to get them all killed."_

* * *

"Hey, dog boy!"

Shikamaru couldn't help it when he first saw Kakashi. He really couldn't. The Nara had been having the worst day ever before this. He'd spent three hours trying to dodge Asuma-sensei, who was determined to befriend him for some reason, and had been saddled with desk duty for a week for handing in his mission report late. He couldn't really tell them his very valid excuse of avoiding his future sensei's annoyingly emotional (for Shikamaru) offer of friendship.

So when he walked up to the barbeque place he'd agreed to meet the others - not the same one that Team 10 would visit in the future but a lesser, inferior one - and spotted both Kiba and Kakashi waiting near the front; the words left his mouth before his brain had time to mull them over. It was a rash move but god, was the reaction priceless.

It was really the perfect nickname for the Hatake, or should he say Hound, if he wasn't so inclined to murder. Not only was he practically half dog himself with his enhanced senses, but he also had a whole pack of ninken that, Shikamaru knew for a fact, he liked to curl up with in a dog-pile to sleep sometimes. Kakashi-sensei had been ruthless in spilling all of his younger self's secrets. The Nara had wondered at the time if it was some weird plot for the sensei to punish himself but Shikamaru hadn't said this aloud and let him continue. Some of the stuff was just too good to pass up knowing.

Kakashi stiffened and turned, staring down the Nara as he approached. Shikamaru watched him from his peripheral, carefully keeping his eyes trained on Kiba. The Nara had to fight off his grin as the Hatake straightened from his lean against the wall.

Shikamaru didn't like being in the past. There were too many ghosts here. The others were better at distinguishing the people they knew and the people they were dealing with now. They fit in better than him. He could play it off as the typical Nara disinterest accurately enough but he knew his friends could see through it. Maybe they were just better actors. Maybe they were better at ignoring the future.

But he couldn't stop thinking about it. He didn't know why he found it so difficult.

So instead, to distract himself, Shikamaru had taken to annoying the shit out of everyone he had once known. Although none of them were as dangerous as Kakashi was.

He was starting to think that he shouldn't have tried this. Kakashi's eye was unforgiving and his killing intent had seeped into his glare. Shikamaru was beginning to wonder when they'd find his body as the Hatake began to step towards him.

And then, as though it was fate, Kiba caught on.

"Oh, hey! Finally, you're here! I've been waiting forever." The Inuzuka exclaimed loudly, flashing his fangs in a smile that was full of knowing at what his friend had done.

As soon has he'd spoken, Kakashi had turned and noticed Kiba. Shikamaru watched the realisation hit the silver haired shinobi that the Nara mightn't have been talking about him. His eye widened and a blush crept up under his mask. The creeping killing intent stopped so suddenly Shikamaru almost laughed in relief. The Anbu captain then glanced about subtly before trying to casually reposition himself against the wall.

"I had to do something (hide from a formerly dead sensei). I'm here now. Where are the others?" Keeping his voice neutral was harder than his face but damn, he wasn't a shinobi for nothing.

"Hina got stuck talking to some Hyuga," Kiba explained, grin widening as he noticed Kakashi's reaction. "She'll be here in a minute. I don't know where Inori is so I sent Akemaru to find her."

Shikamaru shrugged, "She probably got distracted by a mirror somewhere."

"Hey, I resent that comment."

Ino was suddenly beside him and Shikamaru had to fight not to flinch. He held if off with pure will power and pride.

Since becoming ANBU, Ino had taken to suddenly appearing around him. It was her too innocent eyes when he asked her to stop the third time that tipped Shikamaru off. She was purposely doing it to try to scare him and Shikamaru would rather take a kunai in the chest then let her see him even remotely frightened.

"Where's Akemaru?" Shikamaru asked to distract her.

Ino grinned at him, as though she knew exactly what he was doing, before pointing over her shoulder at an approaching Hinata and Akamaru. Shikamaru wasn't surprised at that. Since arriving in the past, Akamaru had spent almost as much time with Hinata as he did was Kiba. They all understood why.

"S-sorry I'm late! Hoheto-san just kept t-talking, I couldn't find an opening to tell him I had to go." Hinata flushed as she hurried up to them, Akamaru wagging his tail in greeting beside her.

"Ah, I've found the best way to get out of those situations is to just leave," Kiba dismissed the apology with a good-natured wave. "Anyway, I'm got to tell you what just-"

"Yamanaka-san, this is for you."

And Kakashi was there, _hovering_ , looking a little uncomfortable. Ino glanced at him in fake surprise. As though she, like the rest of them, hadn't immediately recognised him.

"For tomorrow," His voice was emotionless as he offered her a scroll.

"Thank you, Hatake-san," Ino looked a little sick at accepting the scroll; or maybe it was from having to call Kakashi something so unemotional. Like they were strangers. 

It hurt Shikamaru almost physically when Kakashi stepped back almost immediately after the scroll left his hand. He retreated from their group without any indication of familiarity or intention to become acquainted with the rest of them. It was like meeting a brick wall.

Shikamaru watched Kakashi walk away. The strict ANBU captain stepped into the crowd and slumped slightly in relief, something Shikamaru only caught because he was looking for it. The Nara was struck with the image of the sensei the Hatake would become one day. From the back, like this, he was the same.

Then Shikamaru took an elbow to his side and lost Kakashi in the crowd in order to glare at the still grinning Kiba.

"Hey, where's my thanks for saving your life?"

"He wouldn't have killed me," Shikamaru replied with fake confidence.

"I guess we'll never know," Kiba mused, failing to look serious due to his shit-eating grin.

Ino smirked as she grabbed his elbow, dragging him in. "Come on, I'm starving. And I want to know what happened that Kiba had to save you from."

When Kiba told the girls and Akamaru what he'd done, huddled around their table like school children and speaking in a delightedly hushed voice, Hinata had snorted water out her nose. Ino was far more entertained by Hinata's reaction than the story and promptly spilled hers in surprise. Which in turn caused Akamaru to try to 'help' clean Hinata's face.

What followed was a perfectly normal dinner, for them at least. When Shikamaru tried to ask Ino what the scroll contained, she asked Hinata what Hoheto wanted. When Ino asked Shikamaru why he had desk-duty for a week, he asked Kiba about his last mission. They then stayed until the place kicked them out for feeding Akamaru straight from the plate. Perfectly normal.

It was dusk when they left. The sunset was beautiful.

The Nara slowed to admire it, letting the others pull ahead of him. He hadn't been apart of the conversation- a loud commotion centred around Hinata that had Ino and Kiba arguing -so he dropped back seamlessly. They didn't seem to notice. Or they did and let Shikamaru have his space. Either way, he was grateful. Only Akamaru looked back at him, dipping his head to acknowledge his need for space. The dog was far too perceptive.

Shikamaru watched his friends, his family, his lifeline. Watched the gap between widen. Until he couldn't clearly hear what Hinata was telling Ino, nor the following interruption from Kiba. Until he was alone on the road.

Hands in his pockets, he stopped. Let the dying light give him some warmth. Looked around with a deep breath.

It was just him and the shadows, stretched and twisted from the setting sun. Stretched and twisted yet still undeniably recognisable as what they were. He knew why it was so difficult for him, he had since they'd arrived. He saw it today with Kakashi. He saw it every time he ran into Asuma. He could see it right now in front of him.

No matter how different they may seem, no matter how much time and history and memories divided everything and everyone around him with what he had left; one thing was still uniform. Their shadows were the same. They always would be. And that's all he could see.

Shikamaru couldn't help it, he was a Nara after all.

* * *

_"Shikamaru, go to sleep."_

_"Can't. Gotta finish this."_

***Sigh***

_"Shikamaru!"_

_"What! I- oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know it was you."_

_"And if it wasn't you'd, what? Not apologise for yelling at that person."_

***Cough***

_"No, that's not what- I don't- well it's... It's you."_

_"Don't worry, son, I didn't mean to..."_

***Thud***

_"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"_

_"No, its fi- no. Don't apologise. Not for that. If anyone was going to..."_

***Sniffle***

_"I- I- Choza I'm sorry for- for-"_

_"Shikamaru, it wasn't your fault. You have to know that."_

_"I do but you lost-"_

_"Yes, I lost my son. And you lost your father not that long ago. We both lost a dear friend. The same is true for Ino."_

_"..."_

_"Across both generations we can make one complete Ino-Shika-Cho. The irony."_

***Sigh***

_"I wanted to see you before you left. I've already talked to Ino. I just wanted to say, I know you'll do your best to prevent what's happened. I know you would do anything for my son and for your father and your sensei. I know, I understand. Just, please, look after yourself."_

_"Choza, I..."_

_"Shikamaru, I love you like the second son I never had. Do something for me, please, and love yourself as well. Look after yourself on this mission."_

_"I don't know if I can, not after..."_

_"Thank you for being my son's friend. I have to say that. That day when the two of you shared chips and stared at the clouds for the first time was one of his most cherished memories."_

_"Choji..."_

_"Don't destroy yourself in the name of your friendship because Choji wouldn't have wanted that. Neither would Shikaku. Neither would Asuma."_

_"How, Choza? How don't I do that?"_

_"First, go to sleep. You'll figure the rest out."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shikamaru was hard to write, but I hope I did an ok job :) I was in a contemplative mood when I wrote this (does that come across?).  
> Also very important question to anyone who has an idea: what should Shikamaru's undercover-in-the-past name be? I have the rest but no definite for him.
> 
> Ino=Inori  
> Hinata=Hina  
> Akamaru=Akemaru  
> And of course, because I see 'Kiba' being the Jack or (insert other incredibly common name here) of the Inuzuka's,  
> Kiba=Kiba


	4. Two Fates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Getting injured in the past hurts just as much as it normally does... He was really hoping it wouldn't.  
> Warning: lots of swearing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be a Hinata chapter but my brain decided to overrule that (The Hinata chapter is half done). I also named this chapter after the episode of Naruto I'm currently watching. Oddly fitting right? (Or maybe I'm just lazy)
> 
> Also, yay more angst.
> 
> Also also, still no solid plot here, sorry it's run off with my will to live

_"Hey."_

_"..."_

_"I'm happy they finally agreed to let us see you."_

***Sigh***

_"It hasn't been the same without you around."_

_"..."_

_"We're going on a mission soon. It's a big one. Very important."_

_"..."_

_"Nothing? Come on, wake up. I know you'll be pissed that you missed out on this mission too."_

_"..."_

_"Come on! If you wake up you can come with us."_

_"..."_

_"I..."_

***Sniffle***

_"Please wake up."_

_"..."_

_"Wake up! I know you can!"_

_"..."_

_"Fucking bullshit, come on!"_

_"Hey! No need to yell."_

_"Sensei? But- I- He..."_

_"... They didn't tell you, did they?"_

_"Tell me what?"_

***Sigh***

_"I'm sorry to tell you this but, he's not going to wake up again."_

_"Bullshit."_

_"..."_

_"N-no."_

* * *

He was suffocating.

His chest burned and the ground below him turned away. Trying to force a breath, his mind detached a bit further from his body, having already retreated from the pain.

It was only then he noticed how green the grass was. It had rained continuedly for almost a week and had only let up yesterday. It seemed to have helped the forest greatly.

The ground swayed once more and he realised he was walking. Which surprised him so much that he stopped. He hadn't realised- hadn't felt himself move. He couldn't feel anything other than a sharpness when he breathed.

It was more of a stinging really, that raced up his throat when he inhaled. Pinning down the mysteriously moving pain just made his stomach turn. Trying to swallow, he discovered, was an impossible task. His mouth was too dry. Or wet? On further inspection, his mouth was dry but his tongue was wet. That seemed odd.

He tasted blood. Also odd.

The oddest thing of all was that he couldn't remember what he was doing in the forest. It felt like it was important. He also felt like he was missing something. Someone.

Before his mind could wander more, a shape appeared in the corner of his vision. The stark difference in colour the object had to his surroundings startled him. He stepped back and the world around him protested.

The shape seemed to move separate to his wavering vision and his brain tried to tell him something. He couldn't hear it over the spiking pain in his chest. The shape moved closer and he realised that it was white and... a dog? That's what he was missing.

A dog. Akamaru! Kiba tried to focus on his companion. How long had he been gone? Why'd his chest hurt? Where were they? Oh, that's right, the forest. The grass was so green.

The dog stepped forward, catching his attention again. The dog? Akamaru!

Akamaru. He was ok.

Kiba felt relief swell in his chest so intently it blinded him for a second. Akamaru blurred in front of him from tears and tiredness. Was relief supposed to hurt this much? It didn't matter, Akamaru was here. Akamaru was ok and he was here. Kiba didn't care about anything else in that moment.

Ninja appeared from the forest behind Akamaru. His hand was halfway to his empty kunai pouch before Kiba's brain sluggishly told him they were Konaha ninja. There where three, all of them looking a bit confused. A patrol and not a rescue then. Akamaru must've gotten them. Good boy.

One stepped forward and seemed to be talking to him, her arms up in a placating gesture. Kiba didn't hear a word she said, much too confused by her hair. It was purple. Something told him that he knew her. And should be scared of her. But Kiba trusted Akamaru, so he dropped his hand limply to his side once more.

Kiba was lowered to the ground by a second woman. She seemed worried, which confused Kiba. Akamaru was fine, what else was there to worry about? Over her shoulder, Kiba finally saw the third person that had come into the clearing.

High collar, dark sunglasses, blank expression. The man stood stoically in an oversized coat and observed.

Kiba's mind screamed Protect. Save, guard, protect. What from? Why him?

Aburame. Shino. _Shino_.

No, this wasn't him. The man in front of him was older than Shino was. Is? Kiba didn't know anymore.

As green light- not as nice as the grass green -washed over his chest, Kiba felt a warm drowsiness fill his veins like lead.

Kiba wanted Akamaru.

He reached out blindly and immediately found fur. The warmth of his partner was far more comforting than the healing and Kiba smiled up at his dog. Without opening his eyes. They didn't seem to want to open anymore. When had they closed?

In the darkness, adrift apart from his hand on his best friend, Kiba realised something. It was a silly thing; immature, unattainable.

Kiba wanted to go home. Not Konoha, but _home_. Kiba wanted his mum. It had been so long since he last hugged her. And he couldn't anymore. At least not without looking weird and probably getting punched. The thought of that made Kiba snort, which in turn made the stabbing in his chest flare.

As Kiba slipped out of consciousness, a detached thought drifted around his head and he grabbed it as he fell, dragging it with him.

Kiba would have to watch himself grow up, and know with intimate familiarity everything the younger him would experience. Yet he would never know. A stranger to himself and almost everyone important to him. At least reflections looked back.

_At least reflections looked back._

Kiba woke up crying. He woke up in a soft bed, bandaged and medicated with a weird sentence rattling around his empty head that was making him cry.

A hospital room greeted him when he opened his eyes, way too bright and disturbingly clean. It was a typical Konoha hospital room, right down to the window to his right and the empty bed to his left. Which, on closer inspection, was actually occupied by a sleeping Hinata. She was passed out on the unprepared bed, curled in a ball and peacefully asleep.

On floor next to the window Shikamaru sat with Akamaru spread across his lap. The Nara was trapped by the oversized teddy bear as he brushed out his fur with an intense determination. As though the dog would die if he didn't get all the burs out. Akamaru was enjoying the attention, relaxed and completely unharmed apart from some small bandages around his legs.

Kiba couldn't help the relived laugh that escaped, though it sounded more like a watery, wheezy giggle. The Inuzuka didn't care because he realised that it didn't hurt to breathe anymore. Ah, sweet painkillers. The noise drew the attention of Shikamaru, who whipped his head up in surprise.

"Kiba!" The relief in his voice comforted the Inuzuka more than he thought it would.

"Is Akamaru ok?" Kiba croaked out, demanding an answer as well as he could demand while bed ridden and slightly out of it.

Akamaru barked in conformation as Shikamaru nodded, "Only a couple scratches and minor dehydration from running to get help."

Kiba let out a laugh again, this time with more success, as Akamaru bounded forward to lick his outstretched hand as though to say - _see, I'm fine_.

Now that he'd checked on his partner, Kiba had a second order of business to complete. He only slightly ignored Shikamaru as he kept talking.

"You've been out for a half a day. You were lucky th- What are you doing?"

Kiba fought the blankets and his own drugged limbs in a doomed bid to get free. When that failed, he instead turned to Hinata's bed and tried to reach for it. But it was too far way and Kiba almost face planted off his bed instead, saved only by his trapped lower half.

"Hinata, she's too far away," Kiba huffed out in frustration. "Damn, think you could help here?"

Shikamaru stared at him for, in Kiba's opinion, way too long before letting out a defeated huff and shrugging.

"Sure, why not." He muttered before getting up.

Shikamaru pushed Kiba's hospital bed closer to Hinata's, until they almost touched, complaining the whole time. Kiba wisely ignored him, just happy that the bed had wheels.

Kiba reached over, almost touching her arm before stopping. His hand hovered over Hinata's oversized shirt sleeve and Kiba stared at it as though it had all the answers to the universe.

"Did they find the others? And the scroll- did it get back to the Hokage?" His voice was small but Kiba knew Shikamaru would hear it.

"They did, not too far from where they found you," Shikamaru sighed heavily and Kiba knew what was coming. "Unfortunately, they were dead. It seems they were hit with a higher dose than you."

Kiba couldn't seem to still his fingers. They twitched on their own, lightly touching Hinata's sleeve. He drew his hand back and tried not to think about the three ninja that had died.

He couldn't remember their names. One had been a Uchiha kunoichi, another had a name that sounded like a flower and the last's was super long. That was all he could remember, and he'd talked to them not even a day ago.

"Akamaru and I were scouting ahead. I sent him for help before going back. The gas had mostly dispersed by then. I-" Kiba stopped to breathe, a shaky intake, as he stared at his now closed fist. "They were dead when I got there. I hoped they weren't but- I took the scroll and ran. The enemy, Shika- they were Sound ninja."

The Nara took a sharp breath from behind him and Kiba knew that the genius' mind was starting up for some serious thinking. He was proven correct as, still examining his hand, he heard Shikamaru start muttering.

"Orochimaru, damn. What's in that scroll? It mustn't've made it the first time. The amount of shinobi free in the village at the time... Statistically, the original fourth member would've died with the rest. Argh, therefore Kiba changed this- but to what extent? There's too many unknowns..."

Kiba tucked his hand under the blanket and looked back at Shikamaru.

"Ah, embrace the unknown, Nara." Kiba tried to smile at the other boy but didn't know if he was.

It didn't matter though, as the worried lines and tired eyes on Shikamaru vanished for a second as he snorted at what Kiba said. The small smile on his face was a win for the Inuzuka. Shikamaru didn't smile much anymore and it worried Kiba.

None of them smiled enough anymore. Hinata walked around everyday with the ghosts of her family, dragging her back to what she used to be. Anbu was slowly taking it's toll on Ino, the strain of having to actually be a different person weighed her down. And Shikamaru, he spent too long in his own head and staring at shadows, slowly becoming one himself.

It worried Kiba. He couldn't loose them to the past. He wouldn't let it happen.

A cold, wet nose poked Kiba in shoulder, startling him. Akamaru seemed to have detected his troubled thoughts and had come over to ease them.

"Hey Akamaru," Kiba smiled down at the dog. "Thank you for getting help."

Akamaru just snorted in his face - _of course_ \- before letting out a small whine - _you got hurt bad_.

"I know boy, I know. Wanna come up here?"

The resulting look Akamaru gave him after a pointed glance at Kiba's chest would have given Sakura a run for her money - _absolutely not you idiot, you're still hurt_. The dog then shared a look with Shikamaru, rolled his eyes and lay down next to the bed.

Kiba almost giggled - a dog rolling it's eyes. He'd blame the drugs later.

At least he had Akamaru. And Hinata and Shikamaru and Ino. Curling up to face his female teammate, Kiba repeated their names like a chant. Like he could delay all the bad by using them as a blanket.

He felt bad having to rely on them for something like that. It was selfish of him, wanting to hold on to them. It felt like he was only doing it because there was no one else.

Kiba never wanted to let go.

He started to drift off, thoughts of his friends a comforting reminder that he wasn't alone. Until Kiba remembered something from the forest.

Eyes snapping open, Kiba gasped violently and sat up as fast as his body would allow. Shikamaru, who was in the process of pulling out a book, dropped it in surprise and looked up to find Kiba staring at him with wide eyes.

"Shikamaru," Kiba hissed in horror. "We're now the same age as _Anko_."

* * *

_"This is bullshit."_

_"Kiba."_

_"No, you can't be seriously thinking about this!"_

_"It might change too much!"_

_"Yeah, in a good way."_

_"It's a risk I don't know if we-"_

_"No. Shikamaru. We have to do this."_

_"But-"_

_"We'll be right there! We'll know! We'll have the power to save them!"_

_"It could change the future to much! And then everything that we know happens afterwards will be useless._

_"Oh, that's what this is- you're afraid of not knowing."_

_"... And you aren't, Kiba?_

***Chuckle***

_"Shikamaru, I'm not as smart as you, or Neji or Sakura or almost everyone here. Hell, I'm pretty sure Akamaru is smarter than me sometimes-"_

_"He is, dog boy."_

_"-and the only one of us I think I could beat in a test is Naruto. Naruto! I never know what I'm doing! It works out ok for me. We'll figure it out."_

***Sigh***

_"Do you know why I want to be Hokage? Why I ran myself ragged running around for the village after Pein's attack? Why I did the same during the Fourth War?"_

_"I-"_

_"I'm sure you do, because you know everything. But I'll tell you anyway. It's because I want to protect all of them. My mum, my sister, my clan, sure. But also my friends and the other ninja and all the civilians. Everyone in Konaha. And the other villages too, if they weren't such dicks."_

_"That's an understatement. But Kiba, the Uchiha..."_

_"Yes, some of the Uchiha are pieces of shit and yes, they're way too dramatic and focused on revenge. I honestly don't know how they used to function as a clan. And before you say anything, I know that they're planning a coup at the time."_

_"Then you know the risks if we let them live! This could end very badly for the village."_

_"Come on! I know you have a plan if that happens. And then plans for that plan. And they'll work, don't sell yourself short."_

***Snort***

_"But the Uchiha are just people. Civilians and mothers and sons and all that other shit. Do you know how many of them weren't shinobi? How many were against the coup? How many were Sasuke's age or younger?"_

_"... Yes."_

***Sigh***

_"Shikamaru, this is just doubt. I know you plan on saving them. We wouldn't be going back to that time if we weren't. Hell, we wouldn't have trained for months on how to fight the Sharingan if we don't."_

_"..."_

_"Here, I'll make this easier. If we go back to when we're planning to and do what we're planning to do and we don't try to save the Uchihas, then I'm not going. Find someone else."_

***Slam***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if I get him right in this. My recipe for writing Kiba is to just get a basic Hufflepuff, at some dog boy and mix with a bit of dumb, slightly aggressive cinnamon roll.  
> Does that sound about right? Also just realised that it's almost an exclusively Kiba, Shikamaru, and Akamaru chapter. Woops are there other characters?


	5. And You Caused It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We are the reckless, we are the wild youth  
> Chasing visions of our futures  
> One day, we'll reveal the truth  
> That one will die before he gets there

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a while, I didn't want to screw up Neji. I finally finished this chapter by listening to Youth by Daughter on repeat (as you may be able to tell from the title and the summary).
> 
> Take this offering to the fanfic gods and enjoy.

_"Hinata! Hey, can I talk to for a second?"_

***Mumble***

_"Sorry, what'd you say?"_

_"N-no, N-N-Naruto-kun. I would prefer you didn't."_

_"But I've got to tell you-"_

_"N-Naruto-kun, it may help you telling me but... It won't help me. I-I'm sorry for being selfish but..."_

_"Oh..."_

_"Please, don't tell me. It's better for the mission a-and for me."_

_"Ok, Hinata. If you're sure."_

_"I am. Goodbye, Naruto-kun."_

***Sniffle***

_"Yeah, uh, same. Just so you know, I know you'll all succeed, believe it!"_

_"Th...thank you, for everything."_

_"Of course Hinata, I-uh, thank you as well. I don't think I- we - all of us - could have made if this far and done the things we have without you. Bye, Hinata. I've gotta go - I'm running late."_

***Click***

_"..."_

_"Kiba-kun, I know you're there."_

***Clang***

_"Ah, hey Hinata-chan. Sorry, I uh, didn't mean to... Hinata-chan? Are you ok?"_

_"No, I... I'm not."_

***Sigh***

_"But it was for the best, right?"_

_"I don't think I can answer that, but... I wanna say yes, it is."_

***Sniffle***

_"..."_

_"So, why are you here, Kiba-kun?"_

_"I just came from Shino's. They're letting us see him."_

_"Oh. I-I should go see him."_

_"Hinata!"_

_"Yes, Kiba-kun?"_

_"...Just so you know, Naruto's right. And, ah, I think you will be ok, like in the future - because of this..."_

_"Thanks, Kiba. I th... think I will be too."_

* * *

**Spite** , _noun_. A desire to hurt, annoy, or offend someone; bitter ill will; malice.

Walking through the compound was, as always, just a walk accompanied by ghosts. The whole place was gone in the future, ripped from the ground by Pein. Even most of the people she walked by were dead, killed in the Fourth Shinobi War. Though Hinata didn't mind, these ghosts were comforting.

Hinata saw something out of the corner of her eye that made her miss a step and almost drop the scrolls she was carrying. Neji.

She took it back, not all the ghosts here were comforting.

Neji was training in one of the many training rooms, alone. The room was dark, the only light through the door she now stood in front of. He was panting, looking too small in the large room all by himself. Too young for the anger that he radiated.

Hinata had no idea what to do, she'd only seen Neji in passing since arriving in the past. She hadn't had the chance to talk to him before. Although, in his current mood, it may be inadvisable. Unfortunately, he caught sight of her before she could leave.

"Hyuga-san, is there something you need?"

There was an edge to his polite words that Hinata recognised, as she'd heard it far too much in her life. Neji had been ordered to do something he didn't want to do by the main branch, and therefore had to do it anyway.

Hinata set her face in a pleasant smile while inside her heart raged. Spat in the face of the elders, burned the compound to the ground, turned her clans beliefs on their head.

"Neji-san," Hinata scrambled for an excuse to explain why she would be standing here. "Have you seen Lord Hiashi?"

Hinata didn't actually need to see her fath- Hiashi. The scrolls in her arms were missions that needed to be handed out to some of her fellow Hyuga. She'd spotted a confused genin at the compounds entrance and had offered to deliver them in his stead. The poor boy had had no idea where to go, nor what any of the Hyuga he was supposed to find looked like.

Neji didn't seemed pleased with her question and the way that he looked away for a second confirmed her suspicions.

"Lord Hiashi will be here soon. He wishes for me to spar with Lady Hinata today," He spat the words with practised serenity.

Hinata decided to try her luck, "And you do not wish to do that?"

"It does not matter what I wish to do, I am but a tool for the clan," Neji frowned at her. "And if they wish to use me to train a useless heir when I could be advancing my own talent, so be it."

Observing the boy, Hinata concluded with a cold detachment that he was more volatile that she remembered him being at this age. Although, he may have hid it from her, as acting up in her presence could lead to him being punished. Ignoring the guilt that writhed in her stomach, Hinata decided to push him.

"Well, one day soon you'll be a shinobi, yes?" Hinata knew what she was about to say was a lie but she had to gauge Neji's reaction. "Then you will be free to train when you like."

His face twisted in scowl too old for his small features.

"I will never be free to do anything. It is my destiny to serve this clan and the main family," Neji paused for a moment and seemed to reassess her, finding something he didn't like. "Are you so naïve that you cannot see the cages we've been born into, that have been branded on us?"

She felt herself stiffen. She was no longer Hinata, clan heir, member of the main branch, Kuniochi of the village hidden in the leaves, the disappointment, the weak one. She was Hina, a branch member, a Shinobi of Konoha. No extras. 

Her back straightened from the weight pushing down on it. For a second, she didn't care if she blew the whole mission. This was _Neji_.

"I apologise Neji-san but I think you have it wrong," Hinata stated forcefully, not sorry at all. "You're not the only one trapped here."

Neji, so young, so inexperienced, just looked at her with contempt filled confusion.

Hinata knew this confidence wouldn’t last. But she had to say this. She was and always would be Hinata; sister to Hanabi, cousin to Neji, daughter to Hiashi. He needed to hear it.

"You're cousins may be part of the main branch, but they are no freer than you are."

Hinata's false confidence wavered and she left quickly, unable to see Neji's reaction. She hoped he, being the genius he was, would think on her words. Although, she knew his spite would impede his understanding.

Maybe it wasn't time for him to understand it yet, to become the Neji he died as. Hinata may never be able to talk Neji out of his pain, she wasn't Naruto. That didn't mean she couldn't try.

"Neji."

Even without looking, Hinata knew that voice. She stilled where she was, just outside of the room. Just out of view of Hiashi. Panic crawled over her body for absolutely no reason. It took more time than she thought to regain her breathing and when she did, most of the conversation inside had passed.

"Y-yes, Father." Came a meek reply to whatever Hinata had missed.

She felt her soul leave with her breath as recognition settled uneasily over her lungs. Hinata knew that voice, it was her own.

Not of her own volition, Hinata slid her foot back and shifted to peek into the room. She couldn't see much apart from Ko sitting to the side, so young and inexperienced with his new position, and Hinata, who stared at her cousin with open trust.

Spite. 

Hinata never wanted to burn her clans backwards practices to the ground more than in this moment. But she herself was not that aggressive of a person. The risk of hurting others was to great. The thought of acting so boldly made her act even less so. 

She knew it was a risk - standing here - trying to remain hidden in a compound full of Byakugan, but she couldn't turn away. She hated how Lady Hinata stood, wide eyed and too innocent despite the practised stance she dropped into. There was strength there, and despite his eyes, her father was too blind to see it.

Even now, as the fight between the cousins was only just starting, everyone in the room knew that Hinata was going to loose - even Hinata herself. Standing outside, unable to see half of the match, Hinata knew it too.

In the words of one of her closest friends; this was bullshit. 

Hinata had spent years failing. Not being good enough. Not being brave or strong just because someone else said she wasn’t. Just because she didn’t show it in the way they believed it should be shown. 

Hinata had grown to realise that she was strong. Her strength was just not one that a village of ninjas were easy to accept. She was brave as well. And she was kind and shy.

There was nothing wrong with that. If anyone said otherwise - well, she would let them. She didn't want anyone to get hurt because of her. She could see it now, as her younger self hesitated, pulled back one of her blows.

It was enough of an opening for Neji, who drove forward with confidence. It was over in three hits, none of which were Hinata's. Neji may have been a branch member, but standing over his cousin - victorious - he looked more of an heir than Hinata would ever be.

If you're told something for long enough, you start believing it. Looking at herself in front of her, only a shadow of resilience in her shoulders, Hinata knew that she believed she was weak.

Even now, standing on the outside, understanding that it was false, there was still an echo of it in her heart.

Glancing at Hiashi the best she could from door, Hinata felt like she was the one that had been in a fight with Neji. Her father looked disinterested and a little annoyed, as though he found the whole affair distasteful. He wasn't even looking at the younger Hinata as she struggled to get up from the floor.

No one helped her.

Ko, bless his heart, at least looked like he wanted to help her stand, but he didn't move. He, like Neji, just looked to Hiashi. Waiting for him to pass judgement. He didn't move, so they didn't.

The room remained silent apart from Lady Hinata's ragged breathing. Disappointment hung in the air so heavily that she could taste from the doorway. Hina tried to breathe normally.

_Spite._

Maybe Hinata didn’t want to burn her clan to the ground. Maybe she wanted to burn the whole Shinobi way of life to the ground. 

The cycle of hate would keep spinning and she hated it. And felt sick for being a hypocrite. It was the truth, staring at herself try to stand up, Hinata hated hate. Hated that people could not care for others. Think of others. Be kind to others. 

She wanted to slap empathy into the elders. She wanted to force people to become understanding. She wanted to scream until everyone stopped being so selfish. 

She wanted to grab her younger self, her sister, her cousin, and all of the little versions of her friends and wrap them up. Hinata wanted to protect them, give them a better life away from all the pain and hatred they would come to experience. 

And she would, eventually. But not now.

Instead, Hina turned and kept walking, taking the scrolls and the spite with her. It may be a slow change, but it would happen. She had time. 

Hinata may be quiet, but she was a spark and the past was a fuse. 

Not all explosions had to be loud or messy or violent.

She missed Neji's quick backwards glance at his cousin. Something he hadn't done in years.

* * *

_"No."_

_"Father."_

_"I said no, Hinata."_

_"..."_

_"Please."_

_"You do not know what you're asking me to do."_

_"I-I do, actually."_

_"..."_

_"I'm asking you to the same th..thing that you did t-to Neji-niichan."_

***Shuffle***

_"The same th- the same as you would have done to me."_

_"Hinata-"_

_"Father. Don't deny it. Hanabi-nechan is the heir."_

***Sigh***

_"Why must you ask this of me?"_

_"Why must the clan?"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chap is something different: a Kakashi chapter (because for some reason I can't seem to shake him from this story). Here's a sneak peek (also what are tenses?):  
> 'And he was drowning again. Just like he always was.  
> "I fear being too late again."  
> Kakashi breathed deeply before nodding. Their time had ended. He leaves her sitting there, staring at nothing, so he can go home at stare at nothing himself. Both in silence; a juxtaposition - still and writhing at the same time.'


	6. The Musings of a Broken Hound

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi's experiences with these random Shinobi are having an affect on the Hatake and he does not like that. At all?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Take this please, I don't want it anymore. I wrote half of this like 5 weeks ago so there might be some writing style discrepancies between paragraphs. Sorry about that.
> 
> Some more lyrics from You Are Enough that I had on repeat finishing this:  
> When we grew up,  
> Our shadows grew up too.  
> But they're just old ghosts  
> That we grow attached to.  
> The tragic flaw is that they hide the truth

The first time Kakashi met Raccoon, otherwise known as Inori Yamanaka, he had hated her. It may have had something to do with the circumstances, as the girl herself wasn't that bad.

The Hatake had just came back from a perfectly fine half-day of leave to discover that he had to take at least another two days off and that he had mandatory therapy sessions now. Because he apparently took too many missions, which was _utter crap_.

To make things worse, his 'therapist' was the Anbu newbie, Raccoon.

Kakashi did not do therapy. But he also did not do tantrums, so he went to the room he was told to. The Yamanaka was waiting for him but Kakashi didn't speak a word to her. He sat in his chair, ignored her until she stopped trying and waited for the allotted time to end.

But as he waited, he'd gotten bored. And curious. So, he decided to test her.

"What do you fear most?"

Kakashi's question startled the girl, who seemed to have been in deep thought while staring at her blonde split ends. She was so surprised he talked she didn't seem to register is question at first, mouth hanging open lightly.

Kakashi tried to look as bored as possible as he waited. He didn't think she'd talk, and she didn't look like she would for the longest time. Until she set her shoulders determinedly and spoke.

"I learnt how to heal but I was never a healer. I did it to gain better control of my clan's techniques but-" she faltered, took a shaky breath, continued with the emotions leached out "-they classed me as a healer anyway."

She didn’t speak for a while and Kakashi thought that was it. That she wouldn’t answer the question and they’d go back to the drowning silence

"I was too late," she whispered so softly that without his enhanced hearing, Kakashi didn’t think he would’ve heard, "Both times. Sensei and - they both died. Right under my hands. As I was healing them." 

She looked up and he saw a shine in her eyes and a twist to her lips. She caught his eye and stared for long enough that he felt like he’d invaded her privacy, seeing so many of her emotions like that. 

She looked away, reiterating, "I was too late."

Kakashi felt like he understood. A common thread formed between them. He was too late too. What is with time and there not being enough of it? 

Until he tells himself no, it was different. She was too late to heal. He was too late to stop himself from killing. 

And he’s drowning again. Just like he always was.

"I fear being too late again."

Kakashi breathed deeply before nodding.

The clock dinged in the corner, indicating the hour was up and so was their time.

He left her sitting there, staring at nothing, so he could go home and stare at nothing himself. Both in silence, a juxtaposition - still and writhing at the same time. 

Kakashi understood her. And he didn’t really at the same time but that didn’t matter. He’d understood enough. 

* * *

_"Again Ino."_

_"Yes, Kakashi-sensei."_

***Thump***

_"That was worse than the last attempt. Come on Ino, if you’re not faster than me now you won’t be faster than the sharingan."_

_"..."_

_"Ino?"_

_"I-I can’t! I’m not fast enough!"_

_"Then we’ll train until you are. Get up, let’s go through it again."_

_"No Kakashi-Sensei, it’s not that. I’ll never be fast enough! I’m not built like that."_

_"Ino. Don’t think like that. You have to be fast enough. There’s no second choice here."_

_"But-"_

_"You will be fast enough. Get up."_

_"...Yes, Kakashi-sensei."_

_"Ino, you will be fast enough. We're going to go through this until you are."_

* * *

The Nara was the bane of his existence. Kakashi didn't run into him much, but whenever he did, the Hatake felt as though he was being challenged somehow. It was different from Gai's rivalry, which was loud and ostentatious and always too tiring in the nicest way. The Nara seemed to challenge him subtly, with nothing but a smirk and slouched shoulders and unsaid words. Kakashi, being the socially stunted child soldier he was, didn't know how to handle that.

It was irrational, but Kakashi felt like the shadow user could read him like an open book. Like he knew things about him that no one else did. The latest incident occurred when Kakashi spotted the Nara while he was returning a mission scroll. The other shinobi was on break in the corner of the room _reading Make Out Paradise_ in plain view of everyone else. He had glanced up, spotted Kakashi looking his way and, before Kakashi could do anything, flashed him a sly, knowing grin before returning to the book. As though he knew about the copy Kakashi had bought by accident 3 months ago and 2 villages over which he had now reread over seven times.

No one knew about it - it had been a solo mission and after returning to the village, the book hadn't left his apartment. Even Gai hadn't found it in his fortnightly trespass to challenge his eternal rival to something ridiculous.

There was something else about the boy - man - shadow demon created specifically to irritate the shit out of him - that frustrated Kakashi. It had taken a few run ins to realise exactly what it was. The admission was hard for Kakashi, but he'd come to realise that he enjoyed the Nara's presence. The Annoyance didn't stop there. He seemed to creep into the Kakashi's mannerisms and speech as the Hatake started catching himself from repeating things the Nara had said in verbatim.

The Annoyance seemed to have a comparable intelligence and thought process to himself and something about him made Kakashi want to act like the Nara. He made being a little shit look easy. And fun. And an easy way to get people to stop bothering him.

The Nara wasn't enlightening Kakashi to the easy ways of being an asshole, as the Hatake had already perfected the art of disinterest. Instead, he showed Kakashi through the simple act of being that being a bit of an arsehole could be enjoyable.

And also, after a small mental breakdown from realisation, Kakashi wanted the Nara as a friend. A friend. Kakashi didn't do friends.

And he didn't even know his name.

* * *

_"Ah, Shikamaru. I didn’t think you’d be here."_

***Sigh***

_"Yeah you did. I haven’t left this room in three days. What do you want?"_

_"Oh, nothing. Just checking the progress."_

_"Ah, so you’re just being nosy"_

_"Ma why do you say that?"_

_"You literally going through my notes right now."_

_"Mm."_

_"What do you want?"_

***Rustle***

_"Stop worrying, Sensei. We’ve got this."_

_"..."_

_"Did you ever, say, if it were possible-"_

_"No."_

_"How do you know what I’m asking?"_

***Sigh***

_"No matter how valuable your information from this time frame is, you were never an option for the mission."_

_"Should I be offended? Why not?"_

_"Because, if it comes to it, you won't be able to kill him."_

* * *

The Hyuuga was pleasant enough but something about her bothered him.

Kakashi told himself it was her meekness that threw him off, her slow build to resistance that made his buried impatience gnaw at him uncomfortably. It was logical enough, Shinobi had to be strong and ruthless and violent and she didn’t display any of those outwardly. 

Kakashi ignored the part of him that said that wasn’t it. 

Kakashi tried to avoid her as much as possible, which was easy enough to do given his near constant missions. It took nearly three weeks after the 'Dog Boy' incident for Kakashi to run into her again.

And by run into, Kakashi meant run into.

She'd startled him while he was grocery shopping by forcibly slamming into his back so hard he dropped all of his grocery bags as a small Hyuuga child sprinted away from her. Before he could react, Hina been there apologising and grabbing at the dropped items. She was frazzled and clearly meant to be chasing the escaping child but she was still there, picking up his things for him.

It wasn't until he assured her it was fine that she smiled and took off after the kid. The way she smiled, so completely - with lightness and her whole face - threw him off.

He tried to avoid Hina as much as possible but at the same time he didn't. Sue him, he was curious. Kakashi wanted to know what kind of shinobi she was to be able to smile like she had. So he slowed when he saw her on the street, just to see.

What he saw surprised him. 

It wasn’t that she was weak. It was that her strength came from compassion, from kindness as much as it did her Shinobi training. 

It was soft and slow and steadfast and Kakashi didn’t like it. It made him uncomfortable.

Her presence made it possible that someone could be both. Everything that he wasn’t and yet stronger then him. Yes, she was deadly - her Byakugan was honed to shut off vital points, her hands were calloused from holding kunai. The scars on her arms spoke of close calls, her reflexes sharpened to respond. But that wasn’t any indication of her strength. That was just extra. 

Hina caught him once, as he pretended that he was really analysing the fish in front of him instead of her. The Hyuuga had just smiled up at him, pale eyes bright with warmth, and pointed to a fish with light seriousness.

"You should get that one. I-I couldn't help but notice you standing here for the last ten minutes." She elaborated, "Indecision, right?"

Kakashi had just blinked and nodded along with her. She'd smiled completely at him again and left.

She didn’t annoy him, Kakashi realised after she had walked away. He was jealous of her. That she got to be that while he was stuck as himself. Cold-blooded Kakashi.

Friend-Killer Kakashi.

* * *

_"Oh! Kakashi-sensei, I didn’t see you there."_

_"Sorry for the fright, Hinata. I thought I was the only one here."_

_"I-I just arrived t..to see..."_

_"To see Neji? I’ll leave you to it then."_

_"No, Kakashi-sensei! I didn’t mean t-to intrude..."_

_"Oh, you didn't - really. I was just leaving."_

_"..."_

_"Wait. Hinata."_

_"Kakashi-s...sensei?"_

_"I- well, ah. Damn, why am I-"_

***Sigh***

_"Kurenai's probably already told you this, but I also wanted to say- you've come so far, Hinata, and I believe you, and the others, are going to succeed in-"_

_"..."_

_"What is this?"_

_"A hug, Kakashi-s...sensei."_

_"Yes, I have heard of them. But why?"_

_"Does a hug need a reason?"_

_"With me, yes."_

***Giggle***

_"Fine. Because you n-need one. And so do I."_

_"Ah. When does it end?"_

_"Not yet... Also, because th...the you we're going to meet will need a hug too and I won't be able to give him -you- one w-without getting stabbed."_

_"I wouldn't stab you."_

_"Yes, you would."_

_"..."_

_"Yes, I probably would."_

* * *

The Inuzuka confused him more than anything.

Kakashi didn't know how he'd missed the fellow ninja when he'd been sent like the errand boy he wasn't to deliver Racoon's new orders. But ever since the 'Dog Boy' incident, Kakashi discovered Kiba everywhere. Like he and his dog had always been coated all over Konoha.

Whenever Kakashi saw the Inuzuka training with his dog, arguing with shopkeepers, teasing his friends, Kakashi just got more confused about his opinion of him.

Maybe it was his connection to dogs. Kakashi wasn’t an idiot, he knew he had a soft spot when it came to dog lovers. And he hated hard-headed idiots just as much. Therefore, confusion.

But that wasn’t the only reason. There’d always been a warmth that came from the Inuzuka clan. And Kakashi wanted it. 

There had always been a separation too. So close in abilities yet so far.

He remembered a time just after his fathers death when he wished that he was somehow an Inuzuka. That they’d realise and take him from his empty flat. He had begged silently, staring at the summoning contract in the table in front of him while his feet swung too far from the ground, that they were his family too. It was all there just in the wrong order.

Why couldn’t it be in a different order?

Seeing this Inuzuka boy running around, grinning and joking and laughing brought it all back for Kakashi. He’d forgotten. So much stuff had happened since then. 

This confused Kakashi. He was an independent person, always had been. Private and aloof. But seeing the Inuzuka, interacting with him, brought up the old feelings of wanting to belong. Reminded him that he was cold, always cold. In every sense of the word. Rooms were too breezy, his masked face too closed, the silence that surrounded him too familiar. 

Kakashi realised he wanted to be warm. He didn’t know what to do with that information.

He ignored the thought that told him that Kiba so much as looking at him already made him warm. He went home instead, summoned all of his nindogs and dog piled with them until he fell asleep.

* * *

_"Yo."_

_"There you are! They've been waiting in there for you for forever!"_

***Bark***

_"Ah, about that-"_

_"Yes, yes, you got lost and helped an old lady and then saved a kid from a tree."_

_"I don't think that last one is quite right."_

_"Who cares? Hurry up - Sakura looked ready to punch something through a wall last I saw."_

***Sigh***

_"Shit. Wait, Kiba - what are you doing waiting out here?"_

_"Shikamaru is a part of that meeting you supposed to be in right now. Our mission starts pretty much straight after this."_

_"Really? I thought that wasn't until tonight."_

_"Yeah, it is. In case you haven't noticed, the sun's setting."_

_"Oh, so it would seem."_

_"..."_

_"Kakashi-sensei? Can I ask you a question?"_

_"Sure, why not."_

_"This mission... Why- why do you think they picked me?"_

_"You know why."_

_"Yeah, I know about the clan stuff and the part Akamaru and I have to play but- Is that it? I feel like there's more to it."_

_"..."_

_"Kiba, I'm going to be perfectly honest with you. And I'm sorry if this puts pressure on you for this mission but I believe you need to understand. You were picked to fill the most important role in this whole thing."_

_"What?"_

_"Look at who you're going with. All brilliant Shinobi with abilities practically tailor made for this. But all of them are also flawed in the same way. That's were you come in."_

_"I... how?"_

_"You know how. Hinata thought, until recently, that she was a failure and she'd about to walk straight back into the place that conditioned her to think so. Shikamaru is smart, yes, but he's also an idiot. He's going to obsess over every failure - even things he can't control - and remain rigid when he needs to bend because he's a stubborn, idiot. And Ino, well, she's literally going to be pretending to be a whole different person - in Anbu no less. That's going to take it's toll and, if not handled properly, could completely destroy her."_

_"..."_

_"That's where you come in. Your job is to stop all that from happening. You've got to keep them together. I know you can do it. Don't let them become another me."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this one - I really, truly didn't proof read this one. I'm shoving it out into the word rn because I gotta feel like I accomplished something this week. Stress from uni is fuelling this fic atm.


	7. The flowers didn't speak (but if they could, they would've told her not to leave)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ino was doing just fine, really. Making and keeping friends in the past was definitely not harder than it was supposed to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back. Sorry it's been a while, exams and then holidays kept me busy. Finally have some OCs in here - I didn't want to make any but the story demanded them. And, as we all may know, what the story wants, it shall receive.

_"Well, Miss Anbu, could you come help me up?"_

_"Hmm... Nah."_

_"Hey! This is your fault."_

_"No, I don't think it was."_

_"So some other, random Yamanaka girl just kicked my ass?"_

_"It seems so. She sounds cool though - very inspiring."_

_"You're in a good mood today."_

_"Well yeah, I kicked your ass in less than two minutes flat."_

_"Ha! So you admit it!"_

_"Maybe... Why did you want to spar without Akamaru? He looked so sad when you told him."_

_"...It's a precaution really. Something my mum said before we left. There might come time when he's injured in battle or we're separated or he's off helping one of you guys. I need to be prepared for that. And if... he were to- If Akamaru was to- fuck -die in battle then I-I..."_

_"That won't happen."_

_"It might though-"_

_"Kiba. That won't happen. Not with Hinata and Shikamaru and I around. I won't let it."_

_"..."_

_"Tha-"_

_"Though, I am proud that you're trying to improve yourself - truly. About time, I say."_

_"I- what?"_

***Giggle***

_"Dog boy, you've been treading water since our academy days."_

_"Hey, wait - Ino!"_

***Laugh***

_"Get back here! I'm not losing to you again!"_

_"Good luck with that Inuzuka!"_

_"Stop running Ino, and fight me!"_

* * *

"Inori."

Ino hated it. She hated it more that she hated preparing for Anbu. She hated it more than Anbu itself.

"Inori?"

She had to stop herself from shuddering from the over excessive use of _it_. She wanted to scream that _that_ wasn't her name. Instead, she turned and smiled.

"Sorry, I just got lost in thought. What did you say?"

Her companion's look of concern vanished into smile, ignorant to the truths Ino's words withheld. Kiku Taketori skipped ahead, giddy as she twirled - her white skirt flared, her purple eyes shone and her braided, brown hair lifted in the wind. The setting sun glinted off her Hitai-ate, blinding Ino for a second - _too bright_.

"I was just saying how grateful I am that we've become friends!" Kiku said, grinning lightly. "Who would have thought?"

Ino couldn't help but smile back. "So am I, Kiku. It's pretty lucky we ran into each other when we did."

Kiku had been the medic in charge of Kiba's stay at the hospital after his unfortunate mission with the scroll. He'd had to stay for a week to make sure his lungs healed properly after breathing in unknown toxic gas. They hadn't wanted another Hayate Gekko who, Kiku later told her, caused permanent scarring on his lungs a year ago after sneaking out before he was supposed to.

The excitable girl had recognised Ino immediately but took three days into Kiba's stay to build up the courage to speak to Ino. Kiba and Hinata had enjoyed those three days by theorising on what was the cause of Kiku's odd behaviour. Hinata wondered if the girl had a crush on Shikamaru, who was always there when Ino was, as the medic would get nervous around both the Nara and the Yamanaka. Kiba argued she instead had a crush on Ino, as she had asked him more than once about her after they'd gone home. Well, after Shikamaru and Ino had gone home. Hinata and Akamaru had claimed the other bed in his room and the one time a nurse tried to get Akamaru to get off the bed, he had growled until she'd fled the room while Hinata pretended not to hear.

Shikamaru just thought she was odd. Ino hadn't minded either way, just happy that Kiba had been distracted.

It surprised them all when she claimed to know Inori. It had taken Shikamaru distracting the younger shinobi while Ino discretely skimmed her mind for memories of the Yamanaka she was impersonating to find the connection. Apparently Kiku had looked up at Inori during the academy days after the older girl had comforted the Taketori following a particularly abysmal spar.

Luckily, the two hadn't seen each other since the academy days, as was the case with most of Inori's past acquaintances, so there was no danger of the now medic-nin noticing big discrepancies between who Inori was now and who she used to be. It was comforting to Ino that her father's claim she looked like Inori held true.

Since recognising her as Inori, Kiku had made it her mission to make Ino her friend. And Ino had welcomed the friendship. It was nice, being around someone so light, so happy, so new. There was no residual feelings with Kiku as Ino had never met her in the future. Although that brought forward the uncomfortable thought that there was a reason why. She dismissed it when she could; Kiku always talked about how homesick for the village she came from. Maybe in the future she moved back.

The underlying hero worship made Ino uncomfortable.

The black dress Ino was currently wearing also made her uncomfortable. She was so used to her Anbu outfit that everything else felt awkward against her skin. Whenever she had to wear the normal shinobi uniform, which was not that often, Ino forwent her own clothes and instead dug into the communal clothing pile her three friends all shared. She had grown to understand Hinata's preference for oversized uniforms, as there was something comforting about being wholly enveloped - although Ino always rolled her sleeves up past her elbows. Caught sleeves were much more annoying than the comfort they provided.

Ino had caught herself multiple times feeling for the constant weight of her weapons, her fingers seeking comfort in the uncomfortable situation. It felt odd being so unarmed. She even missed the weight of her sword against her back, even though she almost never used it. She missed the weight of her mask even more, almost unsure of what facial expressions to make now.

Such a step backwards for the great socialiser Ino Yamanaka. She just felt like going home.

Suddenly, orange filled Ino's vision. She startled and refocused to find Kiku holding an orange flower to her.

"Here, for you, Yamanaka." Kiku said, waiting.

Taking the flower, Ino tried to smother a smile as she examined the flower. It was a small, simple flower with a yellow centre and orange petals. The orange was a shade darker than that of Naruto's jacket.

Knowing what Kiku was waiting for, Ino mused with mock seriousness. "Ah yes, this one would be difficult, Miss Taketori, due to the colour if I hadn't seen a red one last week. This beautiful orange flower is but a common cosmos."

"Don't call it common, Inori." Kiku pouted, "You'll hurt it's feelings."

After learning just how many flowers Ino knew, Kiku had made it her mission to find one that she couldn't identify. She didn't try hard though, often just picking an odd flower here or there at random. Her favourite place to do so was from the flowerbed across the street from the bar they frequented.

Twirling the flower, Ino observed Kiku. The girl was just a replacement for Sakura. A perfectly acceptable and enjoyable replacement, but still a replacement for her best friend/competition/rival/best friend. Even their names, Ino thought wryly as Kiku led the way into the bar, were imitations of each other.

"Kiku! Inori!" A Hyuga called from a table at the back of the bar. "Finally! Ryoko and I thought you'd gotten lost."

The only reason Ino liked being in the Anbu was because of the anonymity. They didn't use _that_ name there, instead she was Raccoon. And Raccoon was _Ino's_ Anbu name, no matter what official documents said.

Ino wished they could go back to being acquaintances so that everyone could just call her Yamanaka-san. Instead, she followed Kiku to the table Natsu Hyuga had flagged them down from. She was Kiku's best friend, a kind girl with a gossiping streak a mile wide who could talk a mile a minute. As she was already doing.

"You will not believe what Takuma said- here, we already got you some drinks. It so busy here tonight! I don't know what's going on. So, what too you so long?"

Ino let Kiku speak up, already overwhelmed by the rapid speed of the conversation. It was Kiku's story anyways- there had been an emergency at the hospital. Rather than try to stay afloat in the rapid-fire exchange between the two, Ino turned to the last occupant of the table.

"Hello, Ryoko," Ino said softly, "how are you?"

Fanning a stray wisp of black hair away from her drink, Ryoko looked up and greeted the Yamanaka with happy but tired Sasuke eyes. "Hi, Inori. I've been well. Yourself?"

Ryoko Uchiha. She was Kiku's old teammate who had recently joined the police force and, quite callously, was the reason Ino had stuck around as Kiku's friend. At least, that's what Ino told herself. More contacts and bonds within the Uchiha would greatly benefit the mission and maybe help stem the problems the clan created for themselves.

It was unsettling how much like a Uchiha Ryoko looked, which was ridiculous since she was one. But her eyes were almost the exact same shape and colour as Sasuke's, and Ino should know- she spent enough time as a silly little girl gazing at them. Except Ryoko's had none of the hate that Sasuke's did. She had only ever seen her calm, tired or slightly annoyed.

Though she bet they'd look the same when they spun red and black.

"I've been well, a bit tired but when Kiku calls for a girls night, you have to answer." Ino replied and let herself get swallowed into Kiku and Natsu's conversation.

She was happy that Inori was an introvert, as Ino had no idea what to say in the presence of these gossiping kunoichi. Even though her socialite self was screaming inside every time Ino stumbled in the conversation.

It's not that Ino didn't like them, but she felt uncomfortable the more time she spent with them, as she grew closer to them. Although they didn't know, their friendship exchange could only go one way. Ino could learn their secrets, their likes, their habits but they would never know hers. Not really. They would learn a mask's. There was a lot of Ino in said mask, but it wasn't all of her.

The only people she really had were Hinata, Kiba, Akamaru, and Shikamaru.

Deciding that words would not help her tonight, Ino offered the orange cosmos to Ryoko during a lull in the conversation.

"You seem down, is something wrong?" She asked as the Uchiha accepted the flower with a tired smile.

"It's nothing really," Ryoko relented, "the police force is just so different than normal shinobi missions. It's almost constant - I can't escape it."

"Not to mention you can't escape that crazy clan of yours now that you're trapped in the village." Natsu added.

"Like yours is much better." Ryoko retorted without any heat.

Natsu just laughed. "That's why I do so many missions. I know they'll saddle me with a caring position soon, Lady Hanabi is only going to get older."

"I thought you liked kids?" Ino asked, mildly curious but more so about the rapidly vanishing chance to pry into the Uchiha.

"Oh, I do. I've always been good with them and Lady Hinata and Hanabi are just so cute. It's just- no, never mind that."

Natsu seemed to be hiding her annoyance but when Ino opened her mouth to question the Hyuga about it more, she continued.

"Anyways, I might have some help with that. Hina has been such a help with the kids lately- especially with Neji."

"Oh yes, you've told me about him. Poor boy." Kiku commented with a concerned frown and Ino wondered how much clan drama Natsu had told her.

From the way the Hyuga glanced around for a change in subject, probably a bit too much. Which was a mistake, as Kiku did not have a subtle bone in her body. Natsu's gaze landed on Ino and lit up mischievously.

"Now, Inori," Natsu leaned forward, grin growing in a way that made Ino uneasy. "I couldn't help but notice you in markets yesterday, discussing dinner plans with a young, handsome Inuzuka."

"What, you were there?" Ino said quickly, trying to deflect, "You should've come and said hello."

They didn't take the bait.

"Oh!" Kiku exclaimed, "Was that the same Inuzuka you visited at the hospital? You seem awfully close."

To Ino's utter mortification, Ryoko decided to join in.

Turning a curious look on the blonde, she asked. "But what about that Nara you're always hanging with? I assumed you two were dating. I approve by the way, he's hot."

Natsu gasped at the possibility of more drama while Kiku frowned slightly in contemplation.

"No offense but the Inuzuka - Shiba? Kiba? - is way more attractive than that Nara."

"I've got to agree with Kiku here -"

"Natsu, you don't get an opinion in this." Ryoko cut her off as she rolled her eyes.

"Just because I like girls doesn't mean I can't spot a hot guy." Natsu said, shoving the Uchiha lightly. "Besides, the opinion that matters here is being quiet. Want to weigh in on this, Inori?"

 _Nope_. Ino wasn't going there. Not with these kuniochi she hardly knew, not with Hinata either, not ever.

Taking a sip of her drink to prolong any reply, Ino glanced around the room trying to find a distraction - an escape - anything.

That's when she noticed a table near the front of the bar. At it sat a group of shinobi, most of which Ino did not recognise. However, she did recognise two of them - Raidō Namiashi and Genma Shiranui. A crazy plan formed quickly in her sake addled mind. It was a risk, a gamble, but this talk was not giving Ino much choice.

But first, she needed more time.

"O-oh, would you look at that - I've finished my drink." Ino scrambled up. "And I see you two are almost done too! I'll grab the next round."

Ino was at the bar before any of the table to object. Waiting to order, she questioned her life choices as she prepared to commence a risky extraction plan. Why couldn't the she have met Raido on a mission so she could ask him instead? Or why wasn't Hayate there instead? They'd become quite good friends lately while training up her swordsmanship. Taking the leap, Ino subtly completed the hand sign and reached out her consciousness to touch another.

_Otter-san, sorry to intrude. This is Racoon - the Yamanaka at the bar, from the kuniochi table in the corner. I was hoping you could help me._

His back stiffened and Ino hoped he wasn't angry at the mind intrusion. Some shinobi were sensitive to this kind of jutsu and even though the Genma of the future was fine with it, didn't make his past self the same.

Genma glanced over his shoulder at her, _Why should I?_

_Please. I'll owe you one. Just make up an excuse that makes me have to leave. Please, save me from this torture._

Ino tried to give her best pleading face without the other girls seeing and the Shiranui just raised an eyebrow before turning back around. His mind closed her out like a door slamming in her face.

Admitting her defeat, Ino mournfully accepted the drinks and carried them back the table. Back to what would be her death. Shikamaru would say she was being overdramatic but what did he know about gossiping girls. Kiba would understand.

"Yamanaka-san."

Ino spilled her drink just as she went to sip it, causing the sake to dribble all down her front.

A smirking Genma stood before the table, looking bored and holding a scroll 

"Genma, what are you doing here?" Ryoko asked.

Wait, they knew each other?

"Just being forced to be a messenger. Bit above my pay grade, right?"

Without looking at her, he threw the scroll at Ino, who fumbled from surprise.

"It's from Kakashi," he drawled, "seemed urgent. Might want to read that somewhere private."

And then Genma winked. From across that table, Ino could see the gears turing in Natsu's head and she didn't like what conclusion she would make.

Ino knew exactly what Genma was doing. She'd seen it on the Anbu mission they'd shared and she'd seen it in every interaction he had with Kakashi since - though, admittedly, she hadn't witnessed many. This was wasn't about her, not really. Genma was doing this to try to get a rise from Kakashi. He subtly, and sometimes not so subtlety, pushed the Hatake to elicit a reaction. She was yet to determine what kind of reaction, as Genma's methods were varied, but then, from this time's Kakashi, the answer may just simply be any reaction at all.

Ino would blame Shikamaru, like she did for most unexplainable things. The stoic Anbu Hound had started cracking from Shikamaru's irritating presence. Ino had caught Kakashi on multiple occasions mutter 'troublesome', slouch in front of their superiors, and once even seemed be cloud gazing - although he told Raccoon that he was just napping until their mission started, _which was worse_.

Genma could have quite possibly seen these changes in Kakashi and refused to believe that a lazy shinobi Kakashi had known for only a few months could do what Genma couldn't in years. Hearsay, Ino knew Shikamaru would say, he could've been doing it for years without any input from them. It was a very Genma move.

Ino would still blame Shikamaru, it was more fun that way.

"What did he want?" Ino asked to try to trip him up, but Genma was prepared.

"Something about... training - you better hurry. He can be quite persistent - no, unrelenting?" Genma mused, smirk never leaving his face. "Eager, I think eager is the right word, about … training."

Ino wished she'd asked Raido for help instead, screw the fact she was not supposed to know who he was. Hell, Ino wished she had her sword with her, so she could stab the shit-eating grin off Genma's face.

She still wasn't that good with said sword as Sasuke, the bastard, had decided to shove it into her possession a week before they departed while mumbling something about not relying on her clan jutsu. Ino was convinced that he'd waited so long to give it to her to deliberately annoy her - she had been a horrible fan girl and maybe he hadn't gotten over it (it was Sasuke of course he hadn't). Shikamaru thought that he'd been forced, read 'convinced', by Naruto to give it over and had waited as long as he could to part from it. That explanation would justify the constipated look on his face when he'd shoved it at her and ran.

Nevertheless, Ino was sure she wouldn't miss if she was motivated enough. Which she was.

But she saw her chance and she took it.

"Thank you - Genma-san was it? - for delivering this." Ino said, utterly composed.

Ino wished she could say something terribly witty as payback but found her mind only dragging up future blackmail that had not yet come to pass. Instead, Ino took the only other option, she fled.

"I better go then, Hatake-san probably just wants someone with medical experience around - you know how jonins are with hospitals." Explaining seemed to make it worse, so Ino opted for an assassination quick goodbye. "Ryoko, Natsu - great seeing you. I'll see you Monday, Kiku. Genma-san."

The last she said with a glare as she turned completely from her friends. Genma just smiled innocently.

"A pleasure meeting you, finally."

Genma did keep up his end of the deal though, thoroughly distracting Inori's friends as she fled, regaling Ryoko with an overly dramatic story while making a lot of eye contact with Kiku, causing the medic-nin to blush deeply and stare dumbly. Ino would have to enquire about that later. Fortunately, Natsu was trapped in the corner by Ryoko. Unfortunately, Genma did not seem to care about distracting her. When Ino looked back briefly at the door she made immediate eye contact with Natsu, who just mouthed: _Inuzuka, Nara, now Hatake?_

No, Ino mouthed back but Natsu did not seem convinced. No more girls nights then, Ino decided as she fled the building. Well, there was still Hinata and Ino's girls nights; where they made pillow forts and kicked the boys out and cuddled Akamaru while eating dango, so the world wasn't ending.

Breathing in the free outside air, Ino glanced at what Genma had given her. It was a mission scroll, a bit battered, with a scrap of paper sticking out of it. Pulling it out, Ino read the hasty scrawl

 _You owe me._ _P.S. This is my mission report, I'm going to need it back._

Ino groaned at her luck and wrapped her arms around herself from the night's chill. She hesitated before leaving, glancing at the flower bed.

To anyone else, it would seem as though she was just admiring the flowers but to Ino, it was so much more.

Ino had always liked chrysanthemums more than cherry blossoms. They were her second favourite flower, after hydrangeas. It had to do with the complexity of the petal structure - the way they looked so voluminous and full and bursting with colour that appealed to Ino. The longer they spent in the past, the more Ino realised she preferred the latter. There was a simplistic beauty to the cherry blossom - so bright, so warm, so familiar. So _pink_.

Ino threw the mission report into the flower bed out of spite, crushing a few petals, before heading home. She'd tell him where it was eventually.

* * *

_"Good morning, Ino-chan."_

_"... Morning Hinata."_

_"Do you want s-some tea?"_

_"Argh, please. Do we have anything with more caffeine?"_

_"No, I'm sorry Ino-chan."_

_"... How are you such a morning person?"_

_"I'm not, not really."_

_"Oh?"_

_"Hanabi was-is a morning person. And every morning she would wake me up - I-I guess I just got in the habit."_

_"That sounds annoying."_

_"It wasn't really. Mornings were th..the only time I got to spend with her some days."_

_"..."_

_"S-s-she would - S-she-"_

***Sniffle***

_"Oh, Hinata, come here."_

***Hiccup***

_"S-she- Hanabi would wake me up and she'd be s-so happy, Ino, so happy to wake her big sister up a-and she'd race around my room while I got up a-and every morning she would grab my h-hand and... We'd go outside to sit on the steps and watch the sun rise. Every morning we could - even if one of us was tired from training or a mission. We'd just sit there and watch the sun rise every day - it was beautiful."_

_"..."_

_"Every morning, from the moment she dragged me from my room t-to the moment the sun was fully in the sky, Hanabi would just hold my hand. She hated that kind of thing but she knew I liked it, so she did it. Every morning, for as long as I can remember."_

_"Hanabi sounds like the perfect sister."_

_"She was."_

_"..."_

_"I always wished I had a sister."_

_"Never a brother?"_

_"Nah, I've got too many annoying boys in my life as it is."_

***Snort***

_"Well, Ino-chan, I-I can be you stand in sister if you want?"_

_"Thank you for the offer, but I'm sorry in advance."_

_"Why?"_

_"I'll never be as good of a sister as Hanabi."_

_"..."_

_"Hey Hinata? Could you wake me up tomorrow for the sunrise? I think I've been missing out."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally have a plot (maybe?) or at least a plan for chapters etc but that seemed to have just made me procrastinate this chapter more. I've just been writing stuff that doesn't happen for a very long time and I just want to get to I but alas, I have stuff (that probably seems irrelevant to the story) to write first.
> 
> Also to anyone wondering, I played Fine (Acoustic) by Noah Kahan on repeat while writing pretty much this whole chapter - check him out (if you want or are even still reading this), he has some good songs.


	8. (numb)ers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The past can get tiring. Shikamaru's trying, he really is. (He's just so tired)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while. I was hoping to post this a couple of days ago but unfortunately, I was busy. I hope you enjoy this- it's a long one and is both my least favourite and my favourite chapter so far.

_"Oh come on. Kiba, back me up here."_

_"Nope, no way."_

_"What?"_

_"Dude, I’m seriously doubting you genius right now. That was so misogynistic, I cannot understand how you function on such little brain power."_

_"What do you... what do you mean?"_

_"Can you- do you not see it?"_

_"See what?"_

_"How utterly illogical and stupid you’re being by making assumptions based on someone's gender. Makes no sense."_

_"How do you- what is- just, what?"_

_"Shikamaru, come on. I’m an Inuzuka. Plus, have you met my mother? Or my sister? Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered. I have this book, it’s Hana’s actually - her teammates were shitty to her at the start and Ma wanted her to have some options to deal with it that didn’t end with genin in the hospital. She wasn’t opposed to that route but there’s only so many times you can beat up teammates apparently. I’ll go get it."_

_"..."_

_"What is going on?"_

_"..."_

_"Found it! Haven’t really read it, never needed to - Hana would quote the important bits to me and if that didn’t work she’d just peg it as hard as she could at my head. That always did."_

_"What’s it...about?"_

_"Sexism and how to avoid it. It’s such a human thing - in nature females are way more important than males. It’s pure evolution. Like come on, it just makes sense."_

_"Um..."_

_"I mean, why do you think my mother is clan head? The Inuzuka clan is almost exclusively matriarchal. Works way better that way, the rest of the clans are living in the past. I shudder to think what having a dick in power of a clan would do."_

_"Well, you have met Hiashi. And most of the clan heads aren't really that bad."_

_"Yeah but not all are good. Just look at all the female clan heads- they’re fantastic."_

_"There’s one."_

_"Doesn’t matter- imagine it. Here, read this and let your mind be changed. If you don’t, I’m sorry but I’ll have to kill you and unceremoniously destroy all evidence of your body as per Plan G."_

_"Wait, what?"_

***Clap***

_"Oh! And while we’re at it, we can tackle any toxic masculinity you may - most likely, we’re shinobi after all - have."_

_"Toxic masculinity?"_

_"Has Ino not given you ‘the talk’ about it yet? Those psychology books of Inori’s really gave her a fresh perspective on societal norms."_

_"I... think so? I dozed off really early on, I was running on three hours sleep at the time."_

_"It’s okay man, I’m still dealing with mine. We can deal with it together. What are bros for?"_

* * *

Shikamaru was tired, and not because he'd been up all night digging a hole in the Nara forest with nothing but deer and a talking head as company. The midnight burial had actually been quite invigorating. Shikamaru felt free, now that it was finished- the final piece in the ground. It did nothing to ease the tiredness.

He could be asleep right now, or at least napping, if not for the mission.

Kids were like cats, Shikamaru had realised. Hard to catch, all teeth and claws and hissing. Better to let them come to you, unsure and skittish but with large, curious eyes. The main thing was, like cats, kids remembered if you slighted them and would forever.

This part of the mission was important but also a gamble, never guaranteed to succeed, but Shikamaru had to try. For Naruto.

Right now he was throwing kunai to himself, using the Shadow Gathering Technique to catch them out of the air. Essentially, Shikamaru was juggling kunai. It was still training though, and it meant that he didn't have to move too much- thank Kami. Flashy, but not too much. A calculated move and one he hadn't done yet at this training ground.

Numbers were such important things, he mused inanely to himself to pass the time. Shikamaru added another kunai, leaving one in his hand and three in the air. Everything Shikamaru cared about could be summed up into numbers- Rookie Nine, Konoha Eleven. Team Ten. Watching the three kunai and preparing to throw the last up, Shikamaru decided there were a lot of significant numbers in his life. Four, eight. One, twenty-two, twenty-three.

Seven.

Shikamaru threw the last kunai up just as a voice interrupted his thoughts, scrambling his mind for a second.

"Excuse me shinobi-san, are you a Nara?"

Shikamaru didn't feel the kunai nick his palm as it left his hand. He could only stare at the kid in front of him. His shadows retracted on their own accord, pulling the weapons out of sight.

So open, so trusting.

It hurt to breathe.

The kunai he'd thrown thudded into the ground not far from were they stood but at that moment he couldn't care less about it.

Shikamaru shoved his hands in his pockets to hide their shaking. He found the rock that was always in his pocket and gripped it tight in a bid to regain his grip in reality. The cut on his hand stung from the pressure, drawing him out of his head with his blood.

"Hey kid," Shikamaru went for bored and got close enough. "Yeah, I am a Nara. How'd you know?"

"You look like my friend Shikamaru," Choji said nervously, adjusting the unopened chip packet in his hands, "in a clan way, you know? And that thing you were doing with shadows - that's Nara stuff, right?"

What was that calming technique Ino had suggested he try? Recite the alphabet backwards - no, too hard. It had numbers, counting, the reason she told him about it in the first place.

"Choji! You coming?" A voice called out.

On the other side of the road, in front of a convenience store that Naruto frequented, stood very small versions of Shikamaru's friends. Including Shikamaru himself.

Naruto had been the one to call out, impatiently bouncing around. A small Kiba stood next to him with an even smaller Akamaru on his head. The Inuzuka looked intrigued by the older Nara and moved to join Choji when a six - no, seven year old Shikamaru spoke up.

"Come on, Choji," He said, voice sharp and indifferent at the same time.

Shikamaru knew that tone and glanced at his younger self. Though slouched, his eyes were keen as he studied the older Nara with suspicion.

Luckily, or unluckily, the kids had yet to learn the warning in Shikamaru's voice or properly understand the inner workings of teamwork. Kiba ignored the Shikamaru next to him, and approached the Shikamaru in front of him.

Shikamaru had forgotten how much puppy fat Kiba had as a kid. The Inuzuka was annoyingly adorable. And Shikamaru would take that admission to the grave.

Countdown - that was it. To calm down, try counting backwards.

Naruto, always a second behind, gasped in recognition and jumped forward. "You!"

"Ah, you again," Shikmaru said, trying to find that lazy grin of his. It was nowhere to be found with Choji right _there_. He covered himself with an only slightly forced yawn, "what do you want now, kid?"

As he waited, watching all the emotions cross the blonde's face (he really needed to work on that for sensitive missions (wait, it was Naruto sensitive wasn't in his vocabulary)), Shikamaru decided to give the counting thing a try (Choji was right _there_ ).

_Twenty, nineteen-_

"You promised you show me that cool ninja trick last week!"

Naruto was still yelling, even though he was standing right in from of the Nara. Why were children so loud? Wait, that could just be Naruto. _Seventeen, sixteen._

Kiba turned to Naruto and gasped, "Hey wait! I wanna learn that to!"

He could do this, it was just acting. Shikamaru smiled slowly at the four boys- no, three.

"Come on, guys," Mini-Shikamaru repeated, "you can annoy him for training another day."

The older Nara gave a lazy wave but younger didn't even twitch. He hadn't moved at all since spotting the shinobi training with shadows. _Eleven_.

Choji glanced back at his friend and smiled. "Shikamaru's right," he agreed, "today's not the day for this."

Both Naruto and Kiba groaned in protest but complied, running way from Shikamaru Nara, 19, chunin, and towards Shikamaru Nara, 7, child.

Choji, at least, looked over his shoulder before following after his friends.

"Goodbye, Nara-san."

_Eight, seven._

The younger Shikamaru looked slightly smug, like he'd won something against his other counterpart. Which he had. Of course his plans would be foiled by himself.

_Four, three, two._

Kami, he was tired of these cat and mouse infiltration moves.

With nothing left to do, Shikamaru went home in hopes of having a nice long nap. Instead, he discovered a unresponsive Ino sitting on the floor in their kitchen, blood from a her Anbu clothes staining the cabinets.

Shikamaru did the most logical thing he could think of - he panicked.

"Ino! What happened? Are you hurt?"

There was no recognition, no emotion.

Shikamaru knew his strengths - knew what he knew and what he didn't. He knew shinobi, not people. He definitely didn't know what to do with whatever Ino was at the moment. Her blue eyes showed nothing. It was almost like she was still in a Mind Transfer Jutsu. But Shikamaru knew all the results of all her jutsu and this was not one of them. She was there, somewhere.

He'd deal with that later, somehow. First he had to catalogue damage - there was so much blood. But there were no injuries to count. He checked twice but the origin of the blood was not Ino. Shikamaru was at a loss, kneeling on a kitchen floor in front of an unresponsive Anbu covered in blood that wasn't hers.

Then Kiba was there.

"Come on, help me get her up."

Shikamaru did - Kiba's words held a commanding tone that relaxed the Nara. He sounded like he knew what he was doing. They gripped her arms and pulled. It was so easy - she was so light.

Ino let them lift her up, body seemingly on autopilot. Definitely not a Yamanaka jutsu. The panic resurfaced, causing his arms to shake.

"Where is she hurt?" Kiba asked, already checking.

"She'd not- Kiba," Shikamaru tried to catch his eye, "All of this, it isn't hers."

Kiba nodded, immediately passing the arm he held to the Nara just in case Ino's body decided it didn't want to stand anymore before leaving the kitchen. For a moment, as he passed Shikamaru, Kiba's serious eyes and clenched jaw were interposed with chubby cheeks and a bright smile. Shikamaru sagged a little more from a weight he couldn't identify.

Shikamaru hated how easily Kiba trusted his assessment of Ino. What if he'd gotten it wrong and she was injured? Shikamaru tried to check again, just to be sure, but only discovered his grip had tightened around her forearms in his panic to the point he know would definitely hurt. There was no reaction from Ino- even when he loosened his grip.

_88, 85, 82, 77 - fuck - 70, 67, 64._

He didn't know how much time had passed before Kiba re-entered the kitchen but Shikamaru hadn't moved- Ino hadn't either. Shikamaru tried again to catch Kiba's eye, ascertain his thoughts on this. Again, he couldn't.

"Come on, Ino," Kiba said softly, "Let's get you clean."

And then, Kiba lead them both to the bathroom. Well, he lead Ino to the bathroom but Shikamaru hadn't let go yet. Kiba was so calm, Ino's body once again moving for her. Kiba talked the whole way, in a soft tone about random things. Shikamaru didn't talk at all- didn't even hear what he was saying.

Kiba was _so calm_. The water was lukewarm. Towels were folded in a pile next to the bath with a bowl a to pour water and a brush next to them. So well versed in the art of bathing Akamaru, Kiba was prepared.

Shikamaru wasn't.

Kiba had even laid out a towel to the side to dump the bloodied clothes on. Kiba muttered something about wishing Hinata was here to do this. Shikamaru silently agreed. (But she wasn't.)

The Anbu armour came off easily enough. So easily that the chest piece almost slipped through Shikamaru's fingers from the blood. They couldn't get Ino's Anbu outfit underneath off - it was tight to begin with the blood it stuck to her skin. Kiba cut it off, she had spares. Neither of them touched Ino's kunoichi approved (read: Kurenai approved) crop top and pants that Ino had claimed were called 'bummers'. The blood hadn't gotten to them anyways.

And then, once again, Shikamaru didn't know what to do. His brain supplied him with nothing.

"Here."

There was a damp washcloth in his hand that wasn't there before.

"Clean the blood from her hands," Kiba said it gently, like Shikamaru was going to break any minute. He probably was, so he just did as Kiba said.

Ino sat in the bath and let them wash the blood away. She didn't speak or move the entire time and neither did Shikamaru. Kiba talked the whole time, softly and calmly. The uninterrupted stream of noise washed over Shikamaru, setting him at ease. He didn't know how much time passed - he didn't really care - Shikamaru just scrubbed the red from Ino's hands until Kiba told him to stop.

_729, 243, 81, 27._

Kiba dried her hair and face while Shikamaru dried her arms and legs and both of them left the rest to drip-dry into the towel around her middle. (Kiba quickly dressed the cut on Shikamaru hand.) Shikamaru could then only watch as the Inuzuka fussed around with Ino's never-ending hair, pulling it up loosely, and gently led the now mostly dry Anbu to her room. Only then, for the first time that afternoon, did Kiba look lost. Neither of them wanted Ino to stay in a damp towel (neither of them wanted her to stay in her damp underclothes but neither of them were going to take them off her) but Kiba faultered at the sight of Ino's cupboard.

"I've got it," Shikamaru said, just to feel useful.

He slipped into his room and opened a drawer of his cupboard that Shikamaru didn't like to open. But this was Ino, it didn't matter what he wanted. Fishing out a large red shirt, much larger than any found in the communal clothes pile, Shikamaru hugged it close. This would definitely help Ino.

There was an inexplicable urge to smell the shirt - so he did, but could only smell the lavender of their laundry detergent. Shikamaru was suddenly scared that one day the threads would unravel and disappear like the smell and take the memories with them.

He still took it to Ino's room. The room had once been Inori's but now it just looked like Ino's old room at the Yamanaka compound. Not in the decorations or even the possessions littered around it. It was in the pillows stacked into piles, the plants placed on the windowsill, the scrolls and papers scattered around neatly disorganised.

Kiba looked just as lost as he had when Shikamaru left.

_23, 19, 17, 13, 11, 7, 5, 3, 2._

"I've got it," Shikamaru said again.

Kiba met his eyes for the first time that day and a small realisation pulled in Shikamaru's chest. He had been the one avoiding eye contact with Kiba all afternoon, not the other way around.

"Okay, Shikamaru," Kiba said softly, moving around the Yamanaka and the Nara, resting a hand briefly on each's shoulder as he went, giving Shikamaru two short pats.

As softly as he could, Shikamaru folded Ino into the shirt and then into the bed with the sheets. Ino then folded in on herself, which was _wrong_ \- Ino was a spreader. He couldn't leave when she was like this ( _wrong, folded_ ) so he lay down on the other side of her bed.

Kiba turned off the light from the door and left, murmuring something Shikamaru couldn't hear but knew anyways.

_Three. Two. One._

Shikamaru was tired, so tired he could feel the exhaustion in his bones, but he didn't sleep. He tried. So he waited, curled up next to a cold Ino dead to the world herself.

Shikamaru waited for hours. The shadows lengthened and then disappeared with the sun. The wall clock ticked, marching time on as they stood still in it. Existed out side of it.

Kiba checked in so frequently that Shikamaru pretended to sleep. He pretended to sleep when Hinata returned, tired herself from a full day of Hyuga bullshit, and gently braided Ino's hair, softly humming a tune Shikamaru recognised but couldn't place. He pretended to sleep when Akamaru come and did his own thorough check of the two, even when Shikamaru could feel the light tickle of a cold nose against his cheek and heard the soft whine of a distressed dog.

Shikamaru pretended to sleep until Inori's clock approached midnight and Ino stirred beside him.

"Ino?" His voice was soft but loud in the silent space.

Blue eyes focused. She breathed in sharply. Her fingers twitched. Then nothing again.

As gentle as he could, Shikamaru dragged his arm up so that his hand lay palm up on the bed between them, bandage white in the greys of the night. It was, like them all, a repetitive move they both knew. It was a comfort. A reminder. A pact.

Shikamaru counted as he waited.

It took a 76 seconds for Ino to register, actually register, the movement. It took only 7 more seconds for her to respond and though it seemed to physically tax her, Ino clasped Shikamaru's hand with her own. It was a loose grip, weak from a fatigue they both felt, but it was strong enough for Shikamaru.

"Shika," Ino's voice cracked.

He smiled at his last teammate, his closest friend.

Ino gave him a watery, barely there smile in response.

"Team Ten," Shikamaru and Ino said at the same time, well versed in this strange, bittersweet ritual.

"It's almost midnight," Shikamaru mused, just to say something. Just to stop her disappearing again.

"I-I'm sorry I was like that," Ino frowned, "I don't know what..."

"It's okay, Ino," Shikamaru said, smiling wider in the dark at her worry.

The look she sent him made him want to laugh from relief. It was such an Ino look, miffed and slightly indignant.

"It isn't, not today."

"It is-"

"Happy Birthday, Shika."

There was a moment of silence that seemed to stretch further than the bedroom. Shikamaru imagined it ran all the way across Konoha to the Nara compound, into the main house to the third room on the left. He hoped the younger him sensed it somehow, maybe tossed a bit in his sleep.

The dull chime of the clock broke it. Midnight.

"Happy Birthday, Ino."

The unshed tears in Ino's eyes reflected what little moonlight there was and Shikamaru knew he could only see it because he was looking for them. He wondered if she could see his.

Her grip tightened and his did in response. The small action was such a comfort that Shikamaru fell asleep.

* * *

_"Thanks again for playing with me. The other two are hopeless at shogi."_

_"It’s f-fine, really. I’ve actually been enjoying playing against you."_

***Chuckle***

_"Even if I lose every time."_

_"Hey, you’re getting better. You almost had me yesterday."_

_"No, Shikamaru-kun, you were just tired. I’m f-fine with not winning. I knew I wouldn’t when I-I agreed."_

_"..."_

_"Why do you make plans by playing shogi?"_

_"..."_

_"I-If you don’t mind me asking. I-I - sorry."_

_"No, it’s okay. I was just trying to form the right words."_

_"Oh."_

_"It’s hard to articulate but- shogi is like... Shinobi? No, yes. Yeah, in a very singular sense. Shogi is more like everything. Does that make sense?"_

***Snort***

_"No, not really... maybe?"_

_"Ah, well. What I mean to say it that Shogi can be applied to almost everything in life, if you fit things properly. The pieces have predetermined moves. It’s just it’s easiest to fit them with Shinobi... stuff."_

_"Oh, like battle plans? Certain pieces have certain moves just as certain platoons or groups would on the battlefield?"_

_"Yes! Exactly. It’s a bit more complicated it some cases but you can apply it to even smaller things."_

_"Smaller things?"_

_"You can apply it to things like politics- or even people at a party. As long as you figure out who’s what piece you can plan things out. Is someone aggressive, straight to the point or evasive? You can predict how they’ll act. In a fight, are they fast, mobile around a battlefield like a knight or are they one of many, nothing exceptional, used as fodder like a pawn? But that’s not all, if they reach the other side..."_

_"..."_

_"...Hinata?"_

_"Fodder. A pawn."_

_"What?"_

_"L-like Neji. Ev-v-ven after everything he said about freedom to choose. After his struggle w-with d-d..."_

_"I..."_

_"It was a f-fixed game. He thought he was free to choose but it was fixed! He died a pawn protecting the most important Hyuga piece. A pawn sacrificing itself to protect the king."_

_"Hinata, wait-"_

_"He died thinking he was free but he died doing exactly what all Hyuga branch members are told - destined - to do."_

_"It’s... not that simple, Hinata. You know it’s not."_

_"Isn’t it? Maybe it f-f-fucking should be!"_

_"..."_

_"S-sorry Shikamaru-kun, I’m - we can - let’s continue playing."_

_"No, I’m sorry Hinata, I... don’t think I want to anymore."_

_"Shikamaru?"_

_"I think I’ve got to... go think about what should be. Thank you for... Uh, yeah."_

_"..."_

_"...what?"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit light hearted at the start I admit before it got into it - hopefully it's not too out of character for the both of them (Kiba is a feminist I will die for this if I have to). Hope you enjoyed it - let me know what you think.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know if I'll continue this, I don't really have a plot rn. Please comment if you liked it/want to correct any of my grammatical mistakes.


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